Laugh at this f*cking piece of sh*t story XD

The First Exam

"First, you from the Sound and the brat with the blue hair, knock it off!" Ibiki said, "Who told you that you could fight in here? Do you want to be failed before we've even begun?"

Nikko walked back to his seat. "Sorry," Dosu said, "It's our first time. I guess we're a little jumpy, sir."

Ibiki grunted. "I'll only say this once, so listen up!" he said, "There will be no combat between candidates! No attacking each other without the permission of your proctor and even then, the use of fatal force is strictly prohibited! Anyone who even thinks of messing with me will be disqualified immediately. Got it?"

"No lethal force?" someone asked, "That's no fun."

"Now, hand over your paperwork, once you do, you'll be given a number," Ibiki said, "This number will determine where you sit during the written exam."

"Shit," Nikko said, "I didn't pick up an application."

"I've got one for you," Ukimora said, "And I filled it out already. Lord Third and I both knew you'd decide to take the exam, so I did it all for you." He pulled Nikko's folded up application from his sleeve. "Here."

Nikko thanked him and took the paper.

"Did he say written?" Naruto asked, "No! Not a written test! No way!"

Not much later, everyone had been seated and had a test before them. Naruto was extremely nervous, he even looked like he was about to throw up.

He's so clueless, Nikko thought as Hinata wished Naruto luck.

"Everyone, eyes front," Ibiki said, "There are a few rules you need to be aware of and I won't answer any questions, so you'd better pay attention. Rule number one: This test is graded based on a point reduction system. Contrary to what most of you are used to, you all start with a perfect score of ten points. One point will be reducted for each question you get wrong. Rule number two: Teams will pass or fail based on the total scores of all three team members. Since we've got a team of two, they'll be scored based on the total scores of both of them."

Sakura slammed her head down onto her desk and growled. "What, wait a second! You're saying we all get scored as a team?!" she asked.

"Silence!" Ibiki shouted, "I have my reasons, so shut up and listen. Rule number three: The ninja you see positioned around the room are there to watch you carefully for any signs of cheating. For every incident they spot, two points will be subtracted from your score. Be warned, their eyes are extremely sharp."

Not as sharp as mine, Nikko thought as he activated his Sharingan, A simple genjutsu and I could have them all think they're seeing something they aren't.

"Anyone foolish enough to be caught, doesn't deserve the rank of chunin," Ibiki said, "One more thing. If any candidate should get a zero and fail the test, then the entire team fails."

"What'd he say?!" Sakura yelled.

"The final question won't be given out until fifteen minutes before the end of the exam. You'll be given one hour total," Ibiki said, "Begin!"

Nikko calmly and collectedly picked up his pencil. One look at the test, however, and he decided that cheating was the only way he'd ever pass. I see, he thought, so we have to cheat.

Nikko put his pencil down and rested his hands in his lap. Okay, he thought, it's too obvious if I use my Sharingan. Ukimora has that brain scan jutsu of his, so what do I have? He sighed. Flying Raijin won't be much help. They'll notice if one of the candidates teleports around the room.