Things We Lost In the Fire

Crooked Smile

Prince's worrisome attitude eventually got the best of me and I started to lightly panic about the possibility of being pregnant. I started backtracking about when I specifically could have slipped up. I know I fucked up earlier in August when I forgot my birth control at home when I went to California. The morning of my flight to London, I was so scatter-brained that I forgot to take it. But I know I took it sometime between when I landed and the following day, and I took it the morning after me and Prince slipped up so I'm good, right?

Calling my OBGYN, she told me the exact opposite of what I wanted to here. "Jasmin, even on birth control you should still be practicing safe sex. You said yourself you missed quite a few days of your pill. If you think theres a chance you might be pregnant, you should come in for a pregnancy test." Yeah, right.

The more I tried to push my worries aside, they kept resurfacing. One night when I went to meet up with P at his Lake Minnetonka house, I had no idea what I was walking into. Even after we had protected sex, I could tell something was weighing on his conscious as we laid in silence. Retracting his arm from around my waist, he pulled back the sheer drapes of the canopy bed and walked into the bathroom. Hearing the sound of a drawer closing, he walked back towards the bed with a box of pregnancy tests in his hand.

"Jazz, I know you said you were a hundred percent sure. But can you just at least think about taking a pregnancy test?"

I sat up so fast in bed, I felt a little dizzy for a second. "P, I'm a thousand percent sure I'm not pregnant. When I was pregnant with Noah, I was miserable at least four weeks in. I feel fine." Crawling to the edge of the bed, I sat up on my knees as I caressed the side of his face. "Baby, I understand you're worried, but I'm not taking the pregnancy test. End of discussion."

When I got home the next morning, to my surprise I found the same box of tests stuffed in the bottom of my overnight bag. Throwing the box in the bathroom cabinet to collect dust, my prayers were eventually answered.

Although I did experience some nausea and irritability, low and behold on October 17th, Mother Nature blessed me. Although it was a little heaver than usual, I still got my period nonetheless.

October 29, 1998

Strapping the Blues Clues sandals on Noah's tiny feet, my grandpa hobbled past me and out the front door. Not even a minute passed by before I heard him yell back at me from outside, "Jasmin! whose this scronny, high-yella boy with the heels?!"

Scrunching my face up in confusion, I jogged towards the door. "Grandpa, what are you talking ab—"

Walking up the driveway was Prince, dawned in an olive green sleeveless top, tight black slacks, and tan heels. He could've at least called first. I was praying that this was only a mirage, but grandpa repeated his question.

"Whose this scronny boy with the heels?"

I scolded him, "Pa Pa, be nice!"

Watching Prince stroll away from his car, my eyes darted to his noticeable dick print. Is it bad I wanted to jump his bones on the hood of his BMW? Looking like a whole snack, I thought back to how sexy he looked on his BET Tonight interview with Tavis Smiley a few days ago. The way he looked into the camera made my clit twitch.