Our Life|| Dan Howell X Reader

You Are Beautiful

Warning: this whole chapter is deep feelings and anxiety attacks
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I wiped the blood from my mouth with my sleeve, as I reached for the phone.

I hid behind the counter, trying to steady my spinning head and shaking hands to actually dial the police.

"OHHHH, Y/N!" He yelled, walking into the kitchen, spotting me behind the counter immediately.

I was only in my underwear, that was now spotted with my own blood. I had hit him over the head with the alarm clock when I told him to stop and he wouldn't.

I told him to stop over and over again.
That I didn't want this.
But he didn't care.

So, I clubbed him with the alarm clock, stumbling out of the bedroom to find a phone to call the police.

"WERE NOT DONE YET!"

Before I could get away, he grabbed me by the ankles and dragged me back to our room. He threw me on the bed and locked the door behind him.

I had no energy to try and escape this time. His hands and lips were all over me. I tried to push and kick him away, but he would only punch or slap me harder.

Until he got what he wanted.
Until I was nothing but broken.
And scared.
And traumatized.

You opened your eyes but you didn't move.

Tears streamed down the sides of your face.

But you didn't move.

You felt paralyzed. Your arms and legs were stiff. You felt as if a heavy rock was lying on top of you, keeping you still, pushing down on your body.

Your heart ached, your head screamed.

Your world was crashing.

You were here physically but mentally.

And you couldn't move.

"Y/N." Dan whispered.

But it was like he wasn't even there. You stared up at the ceiling as the tears continued to stream out of your eyes like a rushing waterfall.

Making no noise, no movement, you laid there. Feeling the rock pushing you down deeper, watching your world crash around you.

"Y/N." Dan sat up, turning on the lamp beside him.

"Y/N!" He shook your shoulder.

You didn't respond.

You were a plane about to crash. You were a ship about to sink. You were a bomb about to explode. You were a broken girl about to give up.

"Y/N, please," Dan was shaking your shoulder, stroking your hair, trying to do anything. Say anything.

But in your mind, he wasn't there.

No one was.

It was just darkness...

"Y/N, please." Dan repeated. "Y/N, don't fall down this hole. Come on, please." He held his hand in yours, gripping it tight. "Y/N I love you. I can't live without you."

He was crying now.
Sobbing.
"Y/N..."

You knew you couldn't leave Dan.
You had to live for him.

"Dan." You manage to choke out.

"Oh, Y/N." Dan put your head in his lap, continuing to stroke your hair, softly.