I keep telling myself that I'm stronger than this.
I can beat you again.
But every time I hit, I miss.
I keep trying to make myself believe that I'm as happy as I seem.
But you still get the best of me.
You still hold me down until I'm too weak to fight.
You still convince me that I'll never be alright.
I was getting better for a while,
at least that's what I thought.
Every time I tried to erase you,
you refused to leave no matter how hard I fought.
Now I'm convinced that I'm just gonna be sick forever.
Trying to win is hopeless.
I surrender.
I'm too broken now to continue the belief that I could ever beat you.
You make me think that you're only trying to help me and that nothing is wrong.
But I've seen the darkness that you can cause
and I'm not ready to take it all on.
I've abandoned my own body to become someone else.
I see behind the lies you tell,
You're not here to help.
I'm torn apart inside and I can't feel anything anymore.
How did you do this to me?
I threw in the towel and let you win this war.
You left me empty and hurt.
You cut my pride in half and left me in the dirt.
Your words are like a razor blade,
I don't feel the pain until it's too late.
I'm ready to accept the shame.
I'm never gonna win your game.
I can't stop this circle I'm running in.
It's over for me.
I'm giving in.
I'm letting you win.
YOU ARE READING
One Thousand Tears
PoetryI've tried to release this pain in so many different ways; But writing about you seems to be one of my faves. I don't understand how I find closure When I know it only lasts until the poem is over. Somehow it feels like some sort of imaginary reli...
