Undeniably Yours

16 : Talk that hopefully leads to elsewhere.

*****

But of course he didn't tell her the whole truth. Although the most important, he skipped the part in the story where he was shrunken. He figured it will be too much for her. He manipulated the story a bit, though the gist was still there. He mentioned the black organization,  and how vast their influence is. He also mentioned Miyano Shiho, the scientist from the organization, how he met her, and her role as his partner. And of her current status now as missing. 

Shinichi let out a tired sigh as he finished his story. He was observing Ran's expression as he was narrating,  and honestly, it was too much. She showed utmost surprise and worry as he narrated his near-death encounters with the black organization. He doesn't know if he should feel regret or relief in telling her. 

After a moment of silence, Ran finally spoke up. "Thank you for telling me, Shinichi." She put her hands on her chest, and closed her eyes for a moment. "It means a lot. Now I understand why you are not yourself lately."

Shinichi stared confusingly at her. "W-what? What do you mean Ran?"

She smiled bitterly. 'Still clueless Shinichi.'

"Eversince you returned, you are not acting your usual self." She started, a melancholic gleam starts to spread in her eyes. "I though it's just that case's aftermath,  and you will eventually get over it. But time passed, and still you've changed,  Shinichi. You're not that cocky detective anymore that wants the spotlight all to himself. You even solved cases without mentioning your name. And there were many instances where I caught you staring at nowhere,  like you are in a really deep thought. I thought you were in trouble again. Now I know. "

She stared at him with glistening eyes. Another moment now,  she knew the tears will fall, but she held it in. 'I need to do this. It's now or never.'

Shinichi gave her a worried look. His brows are furrowed. He's confused,  she knew.

"R-Ran?"

"D-do... Do you love me Shinichi?" She said the words slowly but with much emotion.

Shinichi's eyes widened. He was not expecting this conversation to turn out this way. He surprisingly stared at Ran,  trying to process her question.

"R-Ran... I... " He cannot seem to find the right words. It seems absurd that he did not know how to answer, or he was hesitant to answer. His mind started to hurt. He knew... he knew the answer to her question.

It's a yes... r-right?

Yes,  it should be. It must be.

'But why can't I say it? Why?'

He closed his eyes and unbelievably,  the very familiar deadpanned face of a sarcastic woman greeted him. He shut his eyes quickly.

'What was that?! Why did I see Haibara's face on my mind?'

He was still raking his mind when she heard him stifle a cry. He looked at her, and his heart broke into pieces when he saw her face. She was crying. For goodness sake, tears were streaming down her usually bright face. And he knew it was his fault.

'Say yes, you idiot!' He mentally scolded himself.

Yet he can't seem to open his mouth and say that damn one word that will ease her heart.

"I-It's a-alright Shinichi. You don't have to say it. I k-know." She showed him a smile despite all that tears. He felt guilty. 

"Ran...I... I l-love you." He said slowly, but with lowered eyes.