Undeniably Yours

17: Realization

*****

Days passed since their confrontation. It was obvious that something did changed on how they handle each other. Ran was obviously avoiding him, though not openly. Well, he clearly understood. She needed time to get healed. Sonoko pestered him nonstop asking what happened. Thankfully, he always find ways to distract her.

He heaved a sigh. He expected it to be this way, but still he was feeling down. He missed the way they interact. That bright and sunshiny feeling that always surrounds Ran. He silently prayed that she will be alright...that they will revert to how they used to be.

He blankly glanced at the window, and saw many students on the open ground. They are busily preparing booths for the cultural festival.

'Right. It's that time of the year again.'

"OW!"

Shinichi was startled by the sudden cry. He sharply glanced to where the voice came from. His eyes narrowed when he recognize the owner of the voice. 

"Higashi-kun! Are you alright?!" He heard the worried voice of Sonoko as she approached the student who was grimacing in pain. "I told you to be careful with using the hammer!"

Nicholas just look at her and forced a smile. He showed him a finger,  which was obviously red and swollen.  "It's fine Sonoko-san, I was just surprised." He gave her a reassuring laugh. 

After several moments of observing, Shinichi's gaze went back to the window. His mind in deep thought again.

'Nicholas.' Shinichi heaved again another sigh.

He was not able to talk to him again after their talk in the library. He tried asking him again about his friend, but somehow he always eluded the answer. But maybe now that he had an idea about what he truly feels, maybe he will talk to him seriously now. Or so he hoped. 

He had been contemplating everything that happened these past few days. Sure, he was a detective. He gathers facts,  and deduce them. And he only arrived at one astounding conclusion.

He was in love with Shiho. 

Yes, unbelievable as it may seem,  it was the only logical conclusion that can rightfully explain everything. And unexplainably so, he felt right with the realization.

He thoughtfully racked his mind of all the memories about the woman.

'Our first meeting was nasty,' he felt a pang of guilt in his chest. 'I was really harsh to her, calling her a murderer. But still, she did not refute,  and just accepted all the hurtful words that I said. Gods, I feel awful.'

But he silently admits, it was just in the beginning. After all their encounters, he was able to know the real her... that despite all that sarcastic and expressionless facade,  she was a caring woman who will sacrifice herself to save others. She was one of the most selfless persons that he know. Then and there, he learned to trust her. And with that,  they became closer. Come now the endless talks and unending banters which he secretly enjoyed. She became a friend, her partner. And now, he realized,  she became the woman that he likes.

'What an interesting turn of events.'

Never had it really crossed her mind that he will fall for the girl. She was,  as what he described it,  a puzzle. She was unreadable. He can not truly tell what is going on in her mind. She always jokes around, throwing sarcastic comments here and there. She was a pessimist too. She always see things negatively, unlike his childhood friend who was a ball of positivity. He always thought he was in love with Ran, and thay he will eventually end up with her. In fact, almost everyone expected it to be that way. Ran and Haibara was the complete opposite.  Just how did it happen was a complete mystery even to that great mind of his.

Now he can't help but wonder all about her. 

He remembered all those remarks she throws at him. Those certain times he thought she had liked him,  but then she always shrugged it off and said she was just kidding. Did she mean all of it, even just a little? 

He hoped to God, yes.

He wanted to believe that there is a part of her,  even just a little,  that likes him the same way as he liked her.

With this realization arises his deep want to find her again. He wanted to see her,  to fully confirm his feelings. He wanted to bring her back home, to where she rightfully belong. If she cannot find a reason to, then he will give a reason to her.

He's hoping his love would be a good enough reason for her to stay.

*****