I know that if you could see me now, the person that I've become, especially recently, and the things that I've done...well, let's just say that you sure wouldn't be proud of me.
But I try not to dwell on that because it only makes the whole thing worse. I already know how much of a failure and how not good enough I am without having to add your dissapointment into the equation.
But some days, I like to think of them as the good ones, I think of them as my battle scars. These wounds that you've opened up in my mind and my heart, the ones that were always there but that I was just too naive and blind to see before things fell apart in front of me.
But now that putting myself back together has become a habit, I'm starting to see cracks where they've always been. These little hair-thin fractures in all the right places that when pushed together, send me flying to pieces again.
And sure, the mental and emotional scars that I'm having to learn to deal with aren't the only ones that I bear anymore and they never will be again but despite being ashamed of my weakness, these new scars will always be a part of me and I'm beginning to think that maybe that's not such a bad thing.
Because every last reminder of you makes me feel a little better about potentially moving on some day. And that brings me the little bit of comfort that I need more than ever right about now.
YOU ARE READING
With Broken Wings (2013)
Poesía"Take these broken wings and learn to fly again." This is my own personal story of overcoming my demons and my grief. I define my recovery. ι'ℓℓ вє уσυя ѕнσυℓ∂єя тσ cяу ση, уσυя яσcк ωнєη уσυ'яє ησт ѕтяσηg ι'ℓℓ вє уσυя нєαят ωнєη ιт'ѕ вяσкєη, му α...
