Decisions, Decisions (Beau Brooks)

Chapter 27- #IHopeShesDead

My eyes slowly begin to blink open. I failed, Fuck. I guess I do fail at everything.

I turn my head to see Beau, sleeping uncomfortably in the armchair beside this dull hospital bed. I wonder where Belle is.

"Beau" I whisper, trying to gently wake him. He opened his eyes and smiled at me. He must have suddenly came to as he jumper out of his seat and onto my bed, grabbing my face and placing a passionate kiss on my lips. He smiles, "Cara I'm so glad you're okay. I don't know what I would do without you, I thought I lost you." whimpered Beau, pulling me into his chest. "I'll get the doctor!" cries Beau, frantically running our of the room.

The doctor walks into the room, followed by Beau with his hands joined, pressed against his mouth in a praying position. "Welcome Mrs. Brooks, I'm so glad to see you're awake." "I'm not" I mumble under my breath. "We have to run some tests to check your liver." the doctor explains. "An overdose can cause liver failure which will be a long painful death." I stare off into space daydreaming about my rotting liver.

"I'll be back in an hour to take you away for testing." says the doctor, briskly leaving the room. "Who has Belle?" I ask Beau before he could even ask me anything first. "Luke and Lea,why?" "Ask them to bring her in, please?" "But, what if you get upset?" asks Beau with a scared expression across his face. "I need to see her Beau." I demand. "Okay babe, I'll see what I can do." Says Beau, walking out of the room, dialling his phone.

I need to see Belle. Apologise to her. I might be dying, why am I doing this to her? I don't know what's worse, the guilt or the thoughts. Both are destroying me and I don't know what to do about them.

"Ya, Im going to pick Belle up now." exclaims Beau. "first I've to stop off at the house and pack a few things for you. I'll be right back okay, I love you." says Beau planting a kiss on my forehead. "I love you too." I reply as he walks out the door.

I lean over to my bag, resting on the locker beside the bed, taking out my phone and earphones. I scroll through my music and begin to listen to Believe in me by Demi Lovato, while reading through the texts off my friends and family hoping I'm okay and sending their condolences for my loss. I miss Mark. I log into twitter. Pictures arising of me in the ambulance and Beau crying, clutching Belle in his arms with thousands upon thousands of tweets being sent of people sending hate, saying I should be dead if I'm not already. The number 1 trending topic worldwide was #IHopeShesDead. I wish I was.

I just wanna believe in me.