Used To Be • Harry Styles

Sixteen

"Annie," I call out after closing the door to her apartment behind me.

"Hi," she popped out the bathroom. "I didn't know you were coming over."

"Sorry," I shook my head. "I thought I texted you, a lot has happened today."

"Oh, like what?" She smiles as she leads me to the sofa while rubbing my back. "Tell me about it."

"Tell me about your day, first," I offer, trying to hold off. "What'd you do today? How was work and everything?"

"Work was good, I got lunch with James over at El Toro and then after I got out of work I did a little shopping after," she says enthused. "I got this cool poster, remind me to show it to you later, I still need to buy the frame so I just rolled the poster up and put in the closet by the bathroom...." She stopped when she looked at me. "What's wrong?"

"I got some good news," I tried smiling, not knowing what was going to happen after I spilled the news. "Chris and I went over to meet with Richard and Ron this morning, and long story short, they want me over in London next week."

"That's so cool," Annie got super excited. "Why though? What's in London?"

"They're giving us three weeks to record a song for the album, you know just so they see it's actually coming along."

"Oh," Annie nodded. "Do you not have anything for a song? Feeling some pressure?"

"No, it's not that," I shake my head. "Will you come with?"

"Of course," she smiled. "I can't stay very long, but I'd love to. I can meet you there once you have something written-"

"The thing is, it's not only for three weeks," I stopped her. "Annie, they want me tour my demo. They're gonna release it as an EP and they want me to tour the UK."

"For how long?" She asks as she rubs my hand.

"A couple of months, I'm guessing," I shrug. "After that, my album's gonna get released and then I tour again."

"So," she says. "This is gonna be a year long, maybe even longer, ordeal."

"Basically," I nod and take her hand in mine. "I feel like I know what you're gonna say already, but will you come with me? I really want you to-"

"Harry," she takes her hand out of my grip and turns away from me. "You know I can't."

"You just said you'd come to record a new song with me," I say. "Why can't you just quit your job-"

"I'm not uprooting my life for my boyfriend," she bit. "I'm sorry, but as much as you mean to me, I can't just drop everything and follow you around the world."

"Is it about the money? I'll pay you, it could be your new job-"

"No," she stops me. "It's not about that, Harry. I can't just leave here, I can't leave everything I know-"

"Yes you can!" I say. "I've done it."

"I guess leaving people that love you is just easy for you," Annie shrugs. "It sure isn't for me."

"Chris, Alex, Mitch, the whole crew is coming," Harry says. "Almost everyone you love is coming with-"

"But not everyone," I say. "I'm not leaving."

"Not even for the next song?"

"Not anymore," she hisses and gets up.

"Well why not?" I follow her to the kitchen. "What is it with you? I know I'm asking for a lot, but it's just cause you mean that much to me and I don't wanna leave you behind. Will you at least come to visit a lot?"

"Where should I meet you? Dublin or Liverpool?" Annie puts a hand on her hip as she leans on the counter. "You think I can go on vacation when I damn well please?"

"That's exactly what I think, what with a name like yours," I bite.

"Unbelievable," she shakes her head and I let out a grunt, knowing that was low.

"Annie," I plead. "What are we gonna do?"

"I think it's clear what we're gonna do," she puts her hand up. "You're gonna go to London, record another song, go on tour, finish your debut album, release it, tour some more, and repeat."

"And where do you fit into all that?"

"I don't," she looked up at me. "I don't, Harry."

We stood there silent, looking at each other.

"Look," Annie broke the silence. "I'm not asking for you to stay behind, to stop what you're gonna do, that's the last thing I want. I wouldn't want to be the reason for putting your dreams up on a shelf to never get back to, believe me. I'm only saying this, although I know it's not even an option for you, just so you don't feel bad about leaving me, but that's it, Harry. This is where you and I come to an end."

"Are you kidding me?" I scoff. "You're breaking up with me because I'm leaving to go pursue a dream you helped me achieve?"

"I'm breaking up with you because you don't need me to hold you back!"

"You're not!"

"If I don't go," she warns me. "That's exactly what I'll be doing. And you and I both know I'm not going."

"Annie, you can't do this, we're in love-"

"You should go," she points towards the door, wiping a tear from her face. "I'm doing this before you go, because it'll be worse if it's while you're overseas."

"Annie, I love you," I begin to cry.

"I love you too," she spoke before leaving a kiss on my lips. "I'm happy for you, trust me. I'll see you again before you leave-"

"Don't," I shake my head.

I start towards the door and when I reach for the doorknob I look back at Annie, she's standing in the doorway and just looking at me.

I let out a chuckle as I shake my head and walk out the door.