Secrets ; m.e & n.g

20

"I feel so fat." Gilinsky said, in a white girl voice.

"That's because you guys practically all had an entire pizza each!" I laughed. It was already getting dark outside, and the few left over pieces of pizza had already gotten cold. I got up and started to gather the boxes up.

"Let me help you with that." Ryan said, standing up.

"I'll help you too!" Nash exclaimed, glaring at Ryan. I rolled my eyes and continued to pick up boxes, as they tried to be helpful as well. There were about 13 empty boxes that I had to carry, and by the time that I had them all I couldn't see over them.

"You're going to drop those, clutzy. Let me take some." Ryan said, as he grabbed about half of the boxes out of my hands.

"Thanks." I smiled at him. Nash scoffed behind us and pushed past us to throw the bottles he was holding, out.

"What's his problem?" Ryan asked.

"I'm not sure." I sighed, tossing the boxes into the trash can. They barely fit, but there was nothing I could do. I walked back over to the couch and sat down next to Nash. He moved away as soon as I sat down.

"Can I talk to you?" I asked Nash. He groaned and got up, and we walked over to my room.

"What?" Nash asked, once we got up there.

"Why are you acting so jealous?" I asked him.

"Because you and Ryan clearly have something going on." He rolled his eyes.

"Me and Ryan?" I laughed, but he didn't look amused at all.

"Really? You two have been friends forever, and you're telling me that not once have you ever liked him?" He asked.

"I'm not saying that, because I did at one point. Long ago. But now I only have feelings for you, Nash." I told him.

"Sure you do. He clearly likes you. Once you realize that you're going to drop me and go to him." Nash said, becoming angrier.

"I wouldn't leave you!" I yelled, getting angrier by the second.

"Yes, you would!"

"Do you not trust me?!

"Not enough!"

"I don't believe this! Why do you not trust me?!"

"You and Ryan are obviously more than friends! I don't want to be cheated on!" Nash yelled.

"Do you think I wanted to?!" I shouted at him, just as a pain shot through my face. Tears stung my eyes and I looked at Nash. He looked angrier than he ever had, but his eyes were filled with guilt.

"Bye." I said, grabbing my phone and jacket. He said nothing, so I left and slammed the door. The guys were all watching the movie and hadn't noticed what was going on, so I left without them realizing.

As soon as I got out of the building the cold air hit me hard. My cheek stung less than it had before. My phone rang and I looked at the message.

From: Ellaboo

Ooh what are you and Nash doing up there? ;)

She must have not noticed that I left. I ignored the message and slid my phone into my pocket, turning it on silent. The streets were pretty empty, so it was quiet, just how I wanted it.

Once I got to the small coffee shop that I had been going to, I was relieved to see only a few other people were there. It usually wasn't crowded, but at times it could be.

"Get me the usual?" I asked Noel, who was standing behind the counter.

"Anna! I haven't seen you in a while! How was the tour?" She asked happily.

"Honestly, I'd rather not talk about it." I said, my voice cracking a bit.

"Oh, I see. When it's a better time, come tell me?" She asked, handing me my coffee.

"Of course." I said, handing her the money and smiling as much as I could. I walked over to one of the booths and sat down. It was in the corner, away from people.

I took out my phone and ignored all of the notifications. There were 10 missed calls and about 30 texts, so I figured everyone had realized what happened.

I didn't bother checking who they were. I put in my headphones and turned on some music. Since no one else was around, I quietly sang to myself.

This world can be so cruel
She lives her life as a broken tool
And she believes she's unable to fix
This broken machine, and what's the use
To throw yourself at love
If in the end it never seems enough
To be able to get through all of life's broken dreams
She watched her father live in regret
Heard her mother cry in an empty bed
And she swears
This is the best life gets.