NERD (Niam) (boyxboy)

43

"Around when Liam had that party...my mum was in hospital. I didn't tell anyone, not even Harry. I know it's no excuse but that's why I was so harsh on you. I was trying to forget. Rid my pain onto someone else. She was really sick. No one knew she was. Only my family knew. Then Harry broke up with me. And I was alone. My mum was dying and there was no one to hold me. It was when she passed away and I had a breakdown that I realised how wrong I was. How hurting you wasn't going to bring her nor Zayn back. I was only going to have Harry again by fixing my wrongs and doing what's right. I wasn't myself for a while. And I'm not trying to make excuses to you. I'm just trying to let you know that I do know what you're going through to some extent. And I'm here for you. Liam doesn't know this. So I'd really appreciate if you didn't say anything. I only recently told Harry. I continued to lie to him on where she was until I could actually say the words aloud. But if you need anything, I don't care what time or day it is, call me. I will be there. That's a promise".

I really didn't know what to say. Louis pouring his heart out to me is strange. I had no idea he went through such a horrible thing and to think that he didn't even tell Harry tells me how hurt he is. I guess hearing that someone else has gone through what I'm going through right now makes me feel like I'm not as alone.

It didn't take long for me to hear sirens and have police coming up to us asking for me.

I really don't understand what they want with me.

I had nothing to do with what happened to my mum and I don't want to hear their shit.

**

"Mr. Horan, we need you to cooperate with us".

The fuckers have been pestering me for fucking hours and i'm getting very very hungry.

I haven't said a word since they showed me the photos of the "crime scene" asking me all these god damn questions as if accusing me of this happening.

"We heard you have been in contact with your brother".

Fuck no.

"We understand your mother was shot".

Here come the tears again.

"We also understand that she wasn't very good at raising you both, now we see this as a motive to kill her and we believe you're both angry at her for not being the best mothe-"

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up".

I can only clench my hands into fists, so hard that I can feel blood oozing from cuts that have been created by my nails.

"If you cooperate with us Niall, we can help you".

I slam my hands on the table, moving them away and looking down at the blood shaped hands on it.

"I don't need help".

It's becoming hard for me to tame my temper.

I don't know how I'm going to control it any longer.

How dare they speak so horribly of my now deceased mother. She was a complete angel and role model. I don't understand how no one saw it but me.

Just the sight of her getting paler by the second was painful.

I look down to see her blood covering my shirt and just let the tears go. I choke out a sob as the officer leaves the room and wrap my arms around myself, just trying to create comfort.

I miss her so much.

She would be the one to hold me when I was broken, or cook me my favourite meal, or buy me my favourite takeaway.

She was my rock and now I'm left with nothing. My family is gone and this is it. I either move back to Ireland or live alone. I have no one.

I know Liam will be by my side.

His family will be as well.

I know this.

But I also don't have a parent. I don't have a sibling, a cousin, a pet. I have nothing.

If I don't get into this university with the scholarship then I might as well just give up.

I have nothing left.

Now I'm stuck in a police station while they accuse me of killing all I had.

Fucking bastards.

"Mr. Horan". Another goddamn person to interrogate me. Great. "I hear you're giving my colleagues trouble". He motions to my hands and the blood on the table. "Think maybe we should get that looked at?"

I can only shrug as he sighs in frustration.

"You are not helping anyone here by being silent".

"No matter what I say you'll twist it around and make it look like I killed the only thing I had left so what's the point in saying anything when it'll be the same decision anyway?"

"Look, we know you might not have meant to hurt her this much. Maybe just put her and the others in hospital. But we need you to help us find your brother".

"Why the fuck would I know where that bastard is? I hate that fucker!"

"Niall, we really need you to cooperate here. It's for your best interest".

"I'll need you to stop asking my client questions now". A man walks in, startling the officer and I just look down, examining my nail shaped cuts on my hands.

"Are you his Lawyer?"

"I am. I'm also his father so I need a moment with him please".

My entire body tenses as I fight the urge to look up and meet this bastards eyes.

I can hear shuffling, the door opening and closing, the chair in front of me being pulled out to sit on.

"Niall? Are you okay?"

I blink so my vision is clear and let the tears fall down my cheeks.

Maybe this was his plan.

Maybe he worked with Greg to get rid of mum so he could show his face again.

I barely remember this man and he has the decency to ask me if I'm okay? Fuck off.

"Look, I know I may not be your most favourite person at the moment.....I understand that. But I came here to help you because I know you don't have anyone..."

"And who's fault is that?"

It's all I can get out as I let more tears go.

"Niall please, I'm here to help you".

"Fuck you". 

I finally gain the courage to look up. Meeting eyes similar to mine, a small frown etched between his eyebrows as he searches my face. 

"I don't want your help". 

"Niall they want to lock you up behind bars, they're insistent that you helped Greg". 

"I don't care. I would rather that than having to deal with you". 

"Niall..."

"We're done". I look back down and fidget with my hands as he sits there and stares at me. "You go back to your new perfect family and I'll stay here without one". 

"Niall, my parents paid for your bail, let's go". I keep my head down and stand from the cold steel chair, walking towards Liam as he gently wraps his arm around me, leading me out of the police station. 

"I'll try find the money to pay you back". I can't look up as I try tell Liam's parents who just spent probably hundreds of thousands to get me out of there. I feel Liam leading me towards the passenger door. 

"That won't be necessary Niall, you're our family and we do anything for family". I feel my lips curve up a little and nod. 

"Niall, I love you". 

Liam grabs my hand as he starts driving, our fingers intertwined, his thumb gently rubbing the back of my hand to comfort me. 

I fucking hate this world, but I fucking love this boy.