ruby || j.d

-- Chapter 7 -- Tour De Goodbye

(TRIGGER WARNING – mentions of mental illness/mental illness related things – i know they're minute details and in a pretty loose context but like i don't wanna be responsible for someone getting upset bc i care too much about everyone <3)

(AN: also i based the show and stuff off of live streams and stuff that i watched but i did have to make up like half of it so forgive meeeeeee. also i'm interested in who can pick up on the occasional NPI references i slipped in hehehe.

i also accidentally wrote the whole fic in a winter sort of setting even tho it's summer in america. it's winter here in australia so i was just writing about the weather we had so sorry but the seasons are flipped now so we gonna have to go with it otherwise it would be weird if i made it summer all of a sudden lmao)

~ 3rd Person POV ~

It was a foggy and cold winter's night, darkness enveloping Columbus. Everyone was fast asleep except for one particularly damaged soul. She drifted in and out of slumber, restlessly tossing and turning. It had been seven days since the incident and only five since she told her parents. She was scared at first, but Jenna held her clammy hands as she sat at the dining table, telling her parents the whole story. They were very sincere and sympathetic, letting her know they cared. They never said 'I told you so' or 'I knew it', they just simply supported her and asked her what she wanted to do. She was taken to the police and they set a court hearing for just after Christmas. They were on break right now, so she wanted to live and get through Christmas without tainting such a nice holiday. Her favorite holiday, in fact. She never wanted to put a bad name to Christmas, it was the best part of the year.

She missed sleep, her dearly departed friend who only left seven nights ago. She got about two hours sleep every night alas it was never enough for her to have the energy to do anything.

The night was different. Her head was filled with crippling doubt and emptiness. She hated not being able to cry or be sad or angry. She knew it was there, knew she was supposed to feel something, but where it was in her heart, was a gaping empty hole. Even sadness had a spot in her heart, but not anymore. Where all her emotions like anger, happiness, sadness and others were supposed to be, there was a giant cavernous pit of numbness.

It was like when people lost a limb. They sometimes feel its there when it's not. They know its supposed to be there but its not. That's what she felt. She knew something was supposed to be there. She knew exactly what was meant to go there but like the limb, its gone. Its not there anymore and she wasn't sure it would come back. She missed crying, even though it was usually out of sadness, she'd kill to just feel something right now. She lay there, staring at the ceiling the same way she did after he left that night last week. She hated that so much. Her overthinking weighed down on her brain, now 10 after 4. She was taken by sleep.

The cold night had been defeated, the sunny morning stepping up to the podium. It was the first time she'd slept in a week and she just had to be woken up by the shrill screeching of sirens. The sound never ceased it just kept getting louder and louder.

"Shutup," She mumbled almost inaudibly, rubbing her eyes sleepily.

She pulled her pillow over her ears, annoyed at the noise that was separating her from the one thing she wanted. The sirens continued, getting louder and louder.

Her eyes opened slightly, revealing the little light that protruded through a crack in her blinds. Abruptly, but thankfully so, the wailing sirens stopped so she shut her eyes once again. She had gotten only one minute of rest until a loud knock echoed through the house, coming from downstairs.