JF10
I miss you
I wake up feeling a little bit more tired than usual. I don't want to get up, I just want to be in my bed all day long. Dang! But I have to get up! I feel like vomiting! I got up and went to the bathroom, I tried so hard to puke but nothing coming out. I am getting really dizzy. This is not good, I still have tons of paperwork to do. I didn't cook anything for breakfast. I just ate a bowl of cereal. I am staring at the mirror, I just took a shower. I have terrible eye bags, I was able to get a wink last night, all thanks to Gazer. He's nothing but a pain in the ass.
"I can't believe I'm getting ugly because of Gazer!" I said while irritably combing my hair. Lumabas ako at nagtungo sa refrigerator, I want some cheese. Gosh! Just the thought of eating and having cheese makes me want it even more. Why am I even craving a piece of cheese? I don't like dairy products.
"I don't have any cheese." Kibit balikat kong sabi at nagtungo sa kwarto ko at nag bihis na para maka-alis na ako. I am wearing a kinda sexy maroon dress but not revealing, it's just hugging my body and my curves. Yeah right! Forget about Gazer, I'm too pretty for me to think about him. Tumunog ang cellphone ko, and saw Sandy's name on the screen. I haven't checked my phone since last night. I answered the phone call.
"Yes, Sandy?" I said as I check my face in the mirror. Goodness! I've got horrible luggage under my eyes.
"Yes, Sandy? Ghad! You finally picked up! Ylorah! Have you read my text message? I've been trying to call you since last night!" He shouted on the other line. I stopped touching my eyebags when I heard him cursed. Napatakip ako ng bibig and immediately check my call logs. I almost cursed when I saw his missed calls and text messages.
"Sorry, Sandy... I was so preoccupied and exhausted yesterday I wasn't able to check my phone." I heard him sigh. I bit my lower lip, I'm guilty.
"Nako, Ylorah! You're one of my favorites but you're seriously giving me great stress!" Pumikit ako ng mariin. "... Just be here at 5! We have to shoot! You'll be with other models." Aniya at pinutol na ang tawag.
Naisuklay ko ang daliri ko sa buhok ko. Gazer is screwing things up for me! What a great man he is! Kung sana ay hindi niya ako ginulo kagabi ay nagkaroon sana ako ng maayos na tulog, sana nasagot ko ang tawag ni Sandy! At sana hindi ganito ang itsura ng mata ko! This is all Gazer's fault!
I bitterly laugh at my own thought. Goodness! I sound so childish! Giving all the blame to Gazer! But he's partly at fault, right? He said we'll talk today, but I am not yet prepared to talk to him. I keep on getting scared. But I really miss him. Goodness! I really want to punch myself right now! How come I'm so fickle-minded? Why do I keep on having a change of heart? I shake my head to clear my mind.
Gusto ko ulit pumasok nalang sa loob ng bahay ko nang maabutan ko si Gazer na naghihintay habang naka-sandal sa kanyang kotse. Agad niyang inayos ang tindig niya nang nakita niya ako, he gave me that awkward shy boy smile. Kinunot ko ang noo ko para mapigalan ko ang pag-ngiti. I shouldn't smile.
"Hi." He greeted. Sa simpleng Hi niya lang ay grabe na ang paghuhuramentado ng puso ko. Ano ba naman ito? Huminga ako ng malalim para sana pakalmahin ang sarili ko, pero hindi ko na nagawa lalo na nang magtama ang mata naming dalawa. Halos bigkasin ko na halat ng mura sa isip ko. Pero sa kabila ng nararamdaman ko, mas pinili kong irapan siya at hinatayin nalang ang sasakyang pina-book ko.
"May pasok ka?" Tanong niya habang naghalf-jog papunta sa lugar ko. Nasa kabilang side kasi siya ng kalsada, pero hindi masyadong malayo, doon naka-park ang kotse niya. Kumunot ang noo ko nang mapasadahan ko siya ng tingin. Hindi siya umuwi? He's wearing the same shirt, tinanggal niya lang ang kanyang suit dahil mainit na ngayon.
