Purity (Needs to be edited, ON HOLD)

Chapter 11

One month later
Spencer

Toby and I have successfully been friends with benefits for a month now and honestly I have to admit I'm enjoying it.

No one knows about it. Like no one, not even friends and I'm glad.

Cassandra I made up but I know she is trying to figure out what's going on with Toby and I and more importantly why he calls me ace and she never got a nickname.

I love her but she honestly needs to chill.

Moving off of everyone else, my coming out party is in a week and I hate to admit it but I am excited about it.

The only reason why is stupid but, it's a time I get to actually be around Toby and not have to sneak or be careful.

Yeah, over this past month I've realized that I sort of do have feelings for Toby. Not that they will ever be returned but feeling them won't hurt anyone.

"I'm so glad we're actually hanging out today. You've been like m.i.a the past month" Cassidy says as she sits next to me in her screening room, handing me a bowl of popcorn.

"That's not true"

"Is so. Everytime I've asked you to hang out there was always something up. Or when you did come you would have to leave earlier than normal. What's up? Is everything good?"

"Uh.. yeah" I mumble. I know I can trust her it's more about not wanting anyone to judge me.

I know she wouldn't because she's been my best friend forever, maybe I can trust her.

"I'm gonna tell you something. And you might judge me for it... but here goes" I gulp. "When I went to make up with Toby I asked him if we could be friends with benefits. Without actual intercourse because I'm not down for that yet. But he was in and we've been fooling around for the past month"

Instead of a negative reaction she smiles at me.

"What?" I ask

"Toby likes you?"

"What?" I question

"He likes you"

"Why are you saying this?"

"He cut off everything with Cassandra and when she asked why he said he's hooking up with someone right now and being with anyone else feels weird and he doesn't want this person hurt in anyway. Now that I know it's you I see it. He was different when he said all that. He genuinely cared."

A smile slowly takes over my lips and she gasps

"Oh my God you like him too!!"

"Meeo your voice down. People could come home any minute" I tell her and she giggles.

"So, you gonna ask him to be your date to your party?" She asks

"No. For two reasons, one, the feelings most likely are mutual and two my family"

"Your family doesn't need to know you are together and I'm almost a hundred percent sure they are mutual"

"My sister will know"

"Well that sucks for her. She's too opinionated anyway"

"Tell me about it. I miss Jason" I sigh.

"I'm sure you do" she says as she places her hand on my shoulder.

"Isn't the day of your party his...?"

"Yep." I nod "the 3 year anniversary of his death"

"Why'd you pick that day?" She asks

"I didn't. Wanted it either days before or days after but my mom said she needed something good to remember on that day instead of always having it as a day she lost something"

"I get where she is coming from" De shrugs

"Yeah but I'm supposed to smile and act so cheery as if I'm not thinking about him."

"Well, maybe taking Toby would get your mind off of it?"

"De" I laugh as I swat her arm.

"What? It's not like girls are supposed to come. It's a coming out party, and not that kinda coming out so if I show up what are our families gonna think?"

"You just want me to date your brother"

"I've seen the way he is around you Spence. He's the Toby I grew up with. No he isn't perfect but you make him himself and it looks like he does the same to you because around him you seem more comfortable. I'm not saying it would be easy but you two seem like you could work something out"

I shrug "I don't know. I'll admit to liking him I'm just too shy to do anything because rejection is scary plus I don't wanna stop what we're doing now. Also didn't he say himself he never dates. Like ever⁰