sleep deprivation

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there's this careless sadness
that walks hand in hand
with staying up too late
there's this hazy aura of
sleepiness encompassing me
and i get emotional at
the drop of a hat
maybe this is because
when i'm fully conscious
i try my hardest to suppress
my sadness but with this
intoxicating exhaustion
i open the bottle
and dump it all out at once
carless and cruel and tired

(until, sleepily, i pick myself up
and screw the cap back on,
crawling into bed, cheeks
wet with tears and eyes stinging,
pulling the covers up and forcing
myself to abandon my sorrow
for much needed slumber)

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