i let my guard down tonight
and it's weird because i'm
such a naturally defensive person
but you were with me
and it seemed like nothing had changed
it felt like we were nine years old again
jumping on your bed
and playing with stuffed animals
not like i texted you asking if you
wanted to hang out and you
ignored me the entire summer.
i don't know how to feel about you
i just have this uneasy feeling
churning around in my stomach
i was so anxious and mad
before i saw you and then
i just melted because
you were there and you
were friendly and we were
speaking again, just like old times,
and it felt normal and okay.
but now that i've taken a step back
and assessed the situation i
feel sick to my stomach.
i look at you and i think of
how close we were and
how close we could have been.
i look at you and see the alternate
reality where we're those
closer-than-close best friends
on tv who tell each other everything
and are never apart.
and we were, once.
i was five years old when i met you
and now, ten years later,
i feel like i just met you again.
i let you in with open arms again
and i wish i had kept them closed.
i let my guard down tonight
but i won't make that mistake again.
i still have scissors behind my back, after all.
YOU ARE READING
recycled poetry
Poetry❝i wish i was writing something special, but these words have been used before and there's no originality to it at all. i'm just reusing phrases until they're worn out, like musty library books or hand-me-down clothes.❞ from ❛hand-me-down poetry❜ i...
