BoTW Oneshots

Food Fight - Link

Requested by LOZTP3
(another terrible photo edit by your's truly)
Thank you so much for the 6K reads! They're coming in faster than you can say "Frickin' Lynels"!!
(After Ganon)

Oh my goddess... I cannot cook. Link is actually sometimes a really good cook. It depends mainly on what ingredients he brings home. My favourite of his is the Salmon Meunière. He says he reminds me of a little Rito he met when it comes to that dish. I'm half obsessed with its creamy, rich taste. It feels so warming and rejuvenating for the soul. Especially after I take a beating from a Lynel or something. They can hit hard. Nyeh. Im rambling again.

"(Nm), I'm back!" Link calls from the door. "I got some more food from the Gerudo Region. Riju still hasn't lifted the ban of men getting into the town." 

I turn around to find Link carrying two bags of food. One has a bunch of bread poking out the top and the other has what looks like ingredients for a cake. I turn my head slightly in confusion. Did he want to make a fruit cake or something? Maybe I can add in some Monster Essence when he's not looking to make it Monstrous Cake. 

"One Gerudo lady was selling a bunch of these ingredients and I figured we could make a cake with them. I'm feeling in the mood for something sweet anyway." He says while setting down the bag of bread by the door. 

We get out a bunch of bowls and Link even puts on a small apron. I made it for him when I tried to sew. It's the only think I've actually properly made. The only thing that I can actually do properly is function and fight. Not cook.

"How 'bout we teach ya how to cook?" He suggests. I nod my head and smile. 

"Put the flour in here. Always separate the wets from the dries." He instructs. So I do. The flour poofs into the bowl and along with the rest of the dry ingredients. A little bit got up Link's nose though. 

"a—ACHOO!" Link kitten-sneezes over his shoulder. I laugh at his little sneeze. He's always sneezed like a small kitten. It's adorable. 

"You still sneeze like a little kitty." I giggle.

"You cough like a Hebra Moose, though," He retorts. "Alright. The dries are all mixed, so put all the wet ingredients in the other bowl and then mix them all up." 

I mix them all together, and then Link dumps them into the same one bowl. "Time to mix it all together now." 

My arms are tired from mixing so much so Link takes over. He continues stirring it, but even I can tell that it's beginning to get harder to mix. 

"It's sticky." Link says trying to pull the spoon out of the batter. He does get it, but I now have cake batter all over my face. It tastes good! But still, he got it on my face.

"Hey!" I laugh while slugging a bit of cake batter back at Link. He attempts to dodge it, but he just rams into the table, covering the both of us in flour. 

"Wanna have a food fight?" He asks, dusting off a bit.

"You bet." I run over and grab the bread. I throw a bunch of small buns at Link's head, a few of which he manages to bat away, hitting me instead. 

I pick up a bit of the strangely sticky cake batter and lather it onto more buns. I throw it at Link, batter side to his body. Badabing badaboom. It hit, and it's sticking! Sticky buns slowly drop to the floor. 

"Now we're getting somewhere!" Link giggles slightly maniacally. Grabbing some mushrooms, he begins to fling Hylian shrooms at me. They fall to the floor covered in flour. I tried to get away from them by hiding under the table, but the flour only bellowed up into my face from the falling mushrooms. I scramble from under the table to the door and grab a huge piece of baguette. I chuck one at Link. He catches it in his right hand. He knows what I want to do.

"BAGUETTE SWORD FIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!" I holler as we both spar stupidly, covered head to toe in flour and cake batter. 

"En guarde, thy floury breadloaf!" I yell at Link, jumping back from his sword attack onto the table. 

"En guarde, thy cakey mushroom!" He replies in the same way. Continuing to play fight with the baguettes, Link sweeps his bread under my foot, causing me to fall off the table. He manages to catch me before I fall to my certain demise of getting a bloody nose on the floor. 

"Alright. I think that's enough for today." Link says, putting me down. 

"Okay~" I reply. I give Link a quick peck on the lips. He blushes awkwardly. 

"You taste like cake." He says out of no where.

We just both laugh. 

I was actually playing BoTW when writing this (multitasking at it's finest right there.) and Link started falling asleep when I finished.