Short Of a Breath

|Chapter 6|

I never knew how hard it was to run in the snow until that night.

I ran as fast as i could to Gerard's house, tripping multiple times, on ice. When i made it there i saw police cars and an ambulance. I thought to myself, Gotta find Gerard. As i made it to the doorstep i see two Paramedics, carrying a stretcher out from the door. I stop in my tracts to see what was on it. I was wishing my hardest, hoping it wasn't Gerard.

I got my wish. Cause it was Mikey. His glasses still hanging on his face, his body shadowed in blue. Blood was everywhere. On his neck, his hands, and all over his chest, his face completely unrecognizable.

Mikey. One of my closet friends. My best friends brother. Was dead.

Before i could react, or even think, i ran straight into the house, scanning the place for the love of my life. I ran into his room, papers and books scattered everywhere, but no Gerard to be found. I ran into the living room, and find his mother sobbing to the police officer in front of her. She stares up at me and fresh tears start to taint her eyes, and i had no control over mine after that moment.

"Frank...I-Mikeys.." before she could finish i rushed to find Gerard, selfishly not caring about anything else but him. I can't let him be alone.

I run into the bathroom and find him over the toilet, with no shirt on, sobbing, tears running down his red stained face, and his chest. I fall to my knees, tears running down my face as well, and i crawl to him, grabbing and holding him as tight as i could. He didnt react, arms still at his side, shaking tremendously.

"Gee, im- im so sorry- i- Mikey oh god, Gerard please.." i had no idea what i was saying, i was spilling everything out in mouthfuls, unable to fully think myself. He finally brakes, grabing onto my back, squeezing me as much as his weak body could, and begins to speak through sobs.

" Oh god, frankie- i lost my brot- i lost mikey- its all my fault- i left him- God Frank he's gone-i" i hold onto the back of his neck, rubbing it softly, allowing him to let everything out, and trying my hardest not to sob in his ear like i very much wanted to.

"I'll never leave you Gerard, im right here, okay? please...just breathe." i manage to say.

For almost 3 hours we sat in that bathroom together, unaware of what was going on around us, and not caring because there was nothing else left. Nothing.

Mikey was gone, and for some reason, as we sat there together, intertwined, i believed that Gerard's soul had died with him.

_______________

I look down at the picture in my hands and begin to shake, immediately wanting to puke. I stare at Party, angry and terrified, all at once.

"H-holy shit" I fall to his bed, staring even harder at the photo
"Is there a problem?" I look up at Party, who's staring down at me with concern, not having any idea what I was freaking about.
"How do you know him?" I stand, raising the picture to his face.
"What's your problem"
"How the fuck do you know Mikey!?" I raise my voice. His face goes pale suddenly, as he sits on the bed behind me.
"I can say the same.." he spoke as if he was trying to believe what was coming out of his mouth.
"I grew up with him for a while, he was one of my best friends" I smile at the picture, realizing I hadn't actually seen a picture of Mikey in almost 8 years.
"What do you mean by was?" I begin to feel tears automatically form in my eyes, as I grip the paper harder.
"Frank"
I stare up at him, feeling a tear fall down my cheek. He stares at me,  his expression hit with a sudden sadness.
"He was murdered"

He laughs, sitting up. " and Gerard's alive, huh? i see how that makes any se-"

"I saw him, Party, he was dead, on a stretcher, gone. He was pronounced dead at the scene." i blurt out, clutching the paper in front of me, tears beginning to fall down my face, alot faster.

"He..he isnt dead, Frank. He couldn't have...i hear him, touch him, he isn't dead, i know it.." he trails off, and i can hear myself through him, understanding how he felt. I didn't know what to think anymore. What am i suppose to think about all of this? It was tragic.

"I-can i hold onto this tonight?...i promise i'll give it back in the morning i just...i haven't seen Mikey's face in...years" i look at Party, who was expressionless, laying on his bed.

"Yea, thats fine." he turns over on his side, not saying anything else. I walk out of his room, closing the door behind me, and walk into my room. I find both Ryan and Tyler in the room.

"Hey Frank- oh, are you oka-" i raise my hand, shutting him up

"im fine, can i be alone? im sure Tyler has something to show you, right?" i stare at Tyler who was playing with one of Ryan's stuffed animals. He nods, and grabs Ryan by the arm, taking him out of the room. i hear Ryan whining down the hall as i shut the door, blocking everything out.

I lay on my bed and stare at the picture in my hands, wanting to cry even more, looking into his hazel eyes, similar to Gerard's.

I think back to the best times i had, with Mikes. Me and him would pull pranks on Gerard and it would be priceless, laughing are ass's off as Gerard whines about us scaring him, late at night. Watching him tease Gerard about something embarrassing, like how he loves to wear pink boxers, or how he sings in his sleep, which i already knew, of course. The night i told Mikey how i really felt about Gerard, and how much he really meant to me. He understood, about me being different, about all of us being extremely odd. Because he was Mikey, and thats what made him so special.

"Frankie?..." i look up to see Gerard sitting on the end of the bed, staring down at me, with confusion.

"Gerard..." i sit up and grab a hold of his arm. He climbs onto the bed, sitting across from me, are legs twisted against eachother.

"Are you okay, Frank?" he grabs my hands pulling me closer, but i pull back, not ready to give into anything.

Before he could say anything, i pick up the picture and show it to him. His face instantly turns upside down.

"is Mikey...alive?.."