Sleeping Beauty

Kabanata 33

Kabanata 33

Appreciate

-Iya-

"Good thing, I'm ready for these kind of things!" Miccae said proudly as she looked at us. Tapos na silang ayusin yung pinakiusap ko sa kanila.  "Why did you suddenly decide to change your songs, Iya? At talagang last minute pa ha?" aniya at humalukipkip.

"I'm sorry," iyon na lang ang nasabi ko. "Pero thank you kasi pinagbigyan mo ako..." I tried to give her my sincerest smile but I'm still drowned to my feelings.

"Pasalamat ka kasi special ka sa amin," ngumiti na lang at sinulyapan si Jethro. "Bumalik ka na doon kasi malapit ka na rin halos. I hope you'll enjoy this performance, Iya. This isn't a contest or what, we just want you to enjoy this night and make the most out of it." she smiled.

I slightly smiled at her and nodded. "Thank you, Miccae..."

"No problem! Sanay naman na ako sa ganito, nangyayari talaga ang mga ganito minsan." aniya at sandaling ngumiti sa amin bago muling hinarap ang mga kasamahan niya sa technical booth. 

"Mabuti pa bumalik na kayo doon, malapit ka na ring mag-perform, Iya."

"Okay..." iyon na lang ang nasabi ko.

Pagkalabas namin ay patuloy pa ring kumakanta ang grupo nila Jerome. Humarap ako sa stage pagbalik namin ni Jethro sa upuan namin. Everyone's enjoying and singing along with Jerome's group. Alam kong any minute ay tatawagin na rin nila ako para sa performance ko pero hindi ko alam kung bakit gusto kong manatili muna dito para panuorin sila.

Maybe to encourage myself to stop hoping... and to tell that maybe he isn't for me.

But I'm too in love for him. That even when reality slaps me real hard, I want to think that maybe he's into me as well. Sana. Sana ganun. Kaso kahit gusto kong mag-risk, mas nangingibabaw pa rin yung takot na mas masaktan pa ng husto.

Siguro hanggang dito na lang talaga.

Tama na.

"Cause there be no sunlight

If I lose you, baby

There'll be no clear skies

If I lose you, baby

Just like the clouds

My eyes will do the same, if you walk away

Everyday it'll rain, rain, rain..."

It's funny how I followed his eyes as he roamed around the area trying to look for something. I wish I really have the courage to tell you what I really feel. I wish that it's simple. Pero alam ko na hindi talaga madali yun. I've always been scared of the idea of love. I feel like it's something that's not for me.

"Oh, don't you say goodbye

Don't you say goodbye

I'll pick up these broken pieces 'til I'm bleeding

If that'll make it right"

His eyes stopped at our direction. Hindi ko naman inalis ang tingin ko sa kanya. Our eyes met but I didn't bother to look away. I don't care if he'll see me directly looking at him. Sana para sa akin talaga ang mga tingin niyang iyon.

Bahagya akong napangiti.

Bakit pakiramdam ko para sa akin talaga yung kanta niya? Ako dapat ang kumakanta nun? Dahil sa huli kung meron mang mawawalan sa aming dalawa, ako iyon. Dahil kahit anong atensyon ang makuha ko sa buhay ko ngayon... mas masakit pa rin kapag nawala na sayo ang atensyon ng taong gusto mong pumansin sayo.