How to Love You

37

October 28th

To be honest, I don't know why I went there in the first place, it was stupid of me. It was just another way to torture myself after losing you, I guess.

I just needed to get out of the house that was surrounded by items that haunted me with memories. The bed engulfed with your heavenly scent, pictures of us smiling strung up on the wall, and your completely vacant art studio just reminded me of you, so I grabbed a vodka bottle and drove myself down to Meadow Lake.

Sitting alone in a chair, overlooking the sea, I took large gulps from the bottle and oddly enjoyed the burning sensation of the vodka traveling down my throat. Oddly, physical pain distracts myself from the emotional burning I felt.

Slightly buzzed, I honestly though I was hallucinating when I heard your familiar giggle erupt from further down on the beach. I mean, I was hearing it in my dreams constantly, so I figured it my awful imagination playing yet another trick on me.

Except, when I looked closely, sure enough, there you were, tightly clinging onto Matt and laughing at some dumb joke he told. Knowing that sneaky bastard, he probably just whispered a cheesy pick up line, just like he did when he stole you away from me forever.

Why are you here, Dani? This was our spot; you don't see me bringing other girls here to parade them around the lake. I was so infuriated with you!

Gripping my vodka bottle, I shot up from my seat and began stumbling towards you on the beach.

When my feet hit the sand, I found it increasingly harder to maneuver my way towards you and Matt, but I couldn't let you get away with this. You've already done enough to hurt me, this went too far.

"Hey!" I croaked out, unable to get my voice higher than a whisper. You obviously didn't hear me, as you planted a passionate kiss on his lips, "No! Stop that!" I cried out, tears involuntarily streaming down my face, as a result of my slight intoxication.

"Dani! No!" I wailed one last time, before collapsing into the sand, my face planting onto the ground.

I guess this is what I deserve; a mouthful of sand, tears staining my cheeks, and a nearly empty vodka bottle beside me.