No Shame (Book 2 - No Regrets)

Chapter Tweleve - One Stone

DOMINICK'S POV

Third Saturday of every month is not a day I dread; but I'm definitely not filled with excitement either. Afterwards, a strange feeling hangs over all of us. Usually, Mollie naps a little longer and wakes up a bit moodier than usual. Not in the way that she becomes a terrible-terror; but more she is irritable and sensitive. I carry on my usual routine but I always feel a mental-fatigue.

The tradition of third Saturdays started when Mollie was nearly two years old. The events following the custody case and everything that happened there was filled a lot of adjusting as well as healing; however, after nearly a year old adjusting and healing, I felt ready to take Mollie to visit Nikki's grave. I do not know if our first visit was Mollie first visit ever; but regardless, I wanted Aria to join us. The visit was not very long, but the time we spent there made me realize visiting was a way to keep Nikki present in Mollie's life and mind. However, I did not want to visit too often because visiting Nikki's grave is not a pleasant or painless experience. After discussion with Aria, we settled on an hour or two on third Saturday of every month. We go around lunch-time and have a simple picnic there; sandwiches and juice. After the visit, Mollie is ready to go down for her afternoon nap.

The effects of today's visit do not stray from the usual; however, not everything is the same or within the usual of everyday life. After laying Mollie down for her nap, as I was leaving her bedroom, I found Tyde waiting for me in the hallway outside the door. She had an expression on her face that told me something big was on her mind. Before I could ask, she whispered, "I think I'm pregnant."

There are the unspoken but well-known ends of the reaction-spectrum in regards to the possibility of an unplanned pregnancy. There are good reactions - excitement or being supportive - and then there are bad reactions - getting angry or storming off - However, there is not an exactly ideal or perfect way to react. Although, I am confident, as I look back, that my reaction was probably not a reaction to have.

"But, we're almost done with diapers." I said in shock. Tyde gave me a look before walking into the bedroom, I followed behind her.

"I am freaking out, and I'm trying not to but it just freaks me out even more." She said shaking her hands and pacing around the room.

After a couple minutes of waiting for momentary clarity in my mind, for the surprise to face for a brief second. "Why do you think you may pregnant?" I ask.

"I am nearly two weeks late, my nose is better at picking up scents than a bloodhound, and my boobs might as well have been pounded with a mallet." She answered.

After a little more talking with her and short walk to and from the drug-store, I return with multiple pregnancy tests. While I was gone, Tyde worked on drinking an elephant's weight in water. Her bladder did not take long to demand to be emptied.

"Okay, have a timer set on my phone." Tyde says walking into the bedroom from the bathroom. She places her phone and the pregnancy tests, all capped, on the bed. "How are we going to fit another baby into this apartment. Or even in to our lives?" She asks as she flips the pregnancy tests to face downward.

"We'll make it work." I say as I sit up in the bed. "If we have to." I add, turning my body to face Tyde.

Tyde lets out a sigh as she takes a seat on the bed. "How could we be so reckless?" She asks throwing her hand up to her forehead.

"I am always wearing and you are on the pill. I think the only other way to prevent pregnancy would be purchasing a chastity belt." I say answering Tyde's rhetorical question. I'd hoped a small bit of a humor would lighten the intense stress and anxiousness between both of us; but it only seems to intense the emotions.

"Of course this happens. We are just that f*cking special, got all the f*cking luck and beating those odds." Tyde mumbles to herself. She lets out a deep breath as she runs her hand through her hair, an attempt to calm herself a bit.

I reach out and place my hand on her knee. "We don't know anything yet," I say, ", lets not worry or stress until we know if there is nothing to worry or stress over."

She nods her head and takes a few more deep breaths. "Okay, okay." She says. "And... you know, a baby is great. Wonderful. A blessing. And we did recently talk about having another baby, maybe this soon but life is not one who always follow plans."

"And maybe we're not having another baby this soon. Life is also one to pull a joke, a prank, simply to keep life interesting." I say, still trying to calm Tyde down.

"I love you.  You know that, right?" Tyde says giving me a grateful smile. She leans forward and takes my hand. "And if we are pregnant, I hope the baby is as sweet and kind as you."

I smile and lean over to give Tyde a kiss. "And I hope the baby has your beautiful smile."

Tyde smiles in response and leans back, keeping ahold of my hand. I give her hand a loving squeeze as I smile back at her.

Then, the timer on her phone goes off. We stare at the phone for a moment before unlocking our hands. She turns off the timer on her phone and the takes a long, deep breath. She meets my eyes for a moment before reaching down to flip over a pregnancy test.

She quickly flips the test over. Negative. "Oh, thank God." She exclaims. She flips over the other three, all showing the same results. "Thank God, thank God. I'm not pregnant!" She lets out a relieved laugh as she gets off the bed. "How about I get us two glasses of sparkling grape juice to celebrate?" She says.

I give her a smile and nod my head. She smiles back and the same happy, relieved smile, stays on her face as she turns to leave the room. I wait till she is in the kitchen before letting my expression drop.

It was not until i found out the results, that I realized that part of me wanted them to be positive. I pick up one test and stare at the two digital words. Not pregnant. I let out a sigh as I place the test back down.

"This is a good thing, the best thing for now." I say to myself. Trying to convince my heart and mind. Trying to get rid my mind of the future I had, in those few moments before we knew, imagined. Letting that small joy that was building inside of me ebb away like a wave pulling away from the sand.

Yes, this is for the best...

***AUTHOR'S NOTE***

  I feel that i say this every chapter, but I mean it every time, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR PATIENCE. I can't put into words, the gratitude I have for all of your patience.

Tyde is not pregnant, but the subject of another baby is not completely closed. (DUN DUN DUNNN) - but it won't be the focus of the next chapter(s) with them.

The next chapter will be focusing on Katie.

  Due to real life responsibilities - my education, my job, etc. -, writer's block, commitment to other stories, and matters regarding health, I am not where I planned/hoped to be.

Currently, when I find time to write, I work on developing/finishing the first part/portion (5 or more chapters) of another story on Wattpad ("Voiceless").

As always, I strive to put out the best content I can produce - but I do occasionally give in to pressure and speed up the process -. I have said it before, and I say it again, this story deals with mature subjects/matters and I feel responsible to properly give as accurate a picture as i can produce.

Please forgive any spelling or grammatical errors, i will correct them when I have a chance.

THANK YOU FOR READING! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!

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