Charming Criminal | Light Yagami ✓

Charming Criminal [25]

A/N — It's the chapter guys! At last lol. I hope it isn't too cliche/unrealistic. I did try to make it a bit different by changing up the structure. It's basically a lot of internal debate and flashbacks, but I hope you like it anyway!

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You never really truly know someone.

You never know who someone really is unless you get close, really close. Unless you force your way into that person's mind and explore every hidden niche, every loose floorboard, every cobweb and crack in the wall. You can try all you want, but people are always going to have secrets that nobody could possibly hope to uncover unless you travel too deep. But when you travel that far you risk losing yourself completely, getting lost in the deep waves of their mind, swept along by the tide, unable to swim back to safety, drowning, drowning in their secrets.

Once you get that far, there's no going back.

Light Yagami was a boy with a lot of secrets. Light Yagami was a boy with a dark and crowded mind, full of cobwebs and niches and loose floorboards, more than you could have ever thought. You hadn't realised that until yesterday. You hadn't realised that until he had handed you a key to unlock one of those secrets and you finally saw the real Light Yagami.

And that was when you saw truth to L's words.

Light Yagami was a rose with a stalk full of thorns.

* * *

"I need you to give me a chance, [Y/N]. I need you to listen to me, okay?"

You were stood in his room, facing him. His eyes were dark, tiny pinpricks of auburn, watching you carefully. Your stomach jittered with apprehension, your hands squeezed tight by your thighs. You couldn't take your eyes off his.

"What is it, Light?" You said evenly. You took a step back, involuntarily. He took a step forward. It was like a dance, a game. You were scared of what would happen if you got caught.

"Look, [Y/N], I need you to swear, to swear, that you will never tell anyone. That you will guard this secret with your life."

Your heart was thudding, a drumbeat in your ears, a countdown. When was detonation? His eyes were wider now, glazed, a little frenzied. His voice was low and desperate. He took a few more steps forward, you took them back. He moved slowly, deliberately, but he wasn't smiling. He just watched you with that strange little lustre in his eyes.

"Light you're scaring me," you breathed as your back touched the wall. You were cornered, trapped like a mouse in a cage.

The boy stopped a few paces away, his arms hanging loosely by his side. Your eyes slid over his shoulder, hoping that Ryuk might have been there to offer some help, but the room was empty. "I'm sorry," he said, his voice normal, sincere again. His eyes were not. "But I need you to trust me on this. I need you to promise me that you will tell nobody. I think you know the implications if you do," he added and you suddenly felt like you wanted to be sick. Panic was bubbling in the back of your throat like bile.

"Y-you're Kira, aren't y-you," you stammered, your voice uneven now, governed by the emotions tearing at your brain. Light lowered his head for a few seconds, not saying a word, breathing softly. Then he raised it again and his face seemed to have changed. He looked... peaceful, calm. Angelic.

"Yes. I am Kira."

* * *

Kira.

Derived from the Japanese pronunciation of the word "killer".

Kira was a killer, a murderer.

Light Yagami was Kira.

Light Yagami was a murderer.

But why did he tell you? What exactly did he hope to gain from telling you, just some girl from college? Did he think you could be an asset, did he want you to be a part of his new world... or were you just getting ahead of yourself?

Did you even want to be part of Kira's new reign?

Light might just be using you this whole time. He could very well kill you the second you make a mistake, prove to be no longer helpful. Something to toss away once you've fulfilled your purpose.

But what was this 'purpose'? What exactly did he hope to achieve by telling you?

Did he think you were on his side?

Were you?

He would certainly kill you if you tried to tell anyone. That was the 'implication' he was talking about. He had the power of death at his fingertips. All he had to do was ink your name into that damn notebook of his and you'd be dead.

But you didn't want to tell anyone anyway.

You'd been entrusted with this secret, like a rare jewel. You would treasure it, preserve it, keep it close to you, not let anyone else look at it.

The thorn that had pricked you was now embedded right through your heart.

If you took it out, you'd bleed to death.

If you told anyone, you were dead.

* * *

"How do you do it?"

Light was sat at his desk now, resting his head in his hands. He didn't turn to look at you as he spoke, his voice a low rumble from the back of his chest. "I take it you suspect Ryuk has something to do with it."

You nodded wordlessly, even though he wasn't looking at you.

"You've heard of Shinigamis?"

"Gods of Death," you said almost immediately, your tongue curling around the word 'death', leaving a bitter aftertaste.

It wasn't just 'death' though. It was murder. Light was a murderer. Light was a bringer of death. It was contradictory. Light was a bearer of the dark. Good was the not the enslaver of evil, but merely a variation. You could not bring total peace without a little war, to clear up the disease, the disease of the human condition.

"I have a notebook. Ryuk's notebook. I write a name in it and that person dies," he said simply. You didn't even bother to question him.

"Is Ryuk your pet or are you his?" You asked quietly. You were sat on the floor, your back resting against his bedframe, your knees drawn right up to your chin. You fiddled with a loose thread on his carpet, still trying to understand your thoughts, still trying to understand the boy in front of you.

Light sniffed at that. "I don't really know. Neither perhaps. I'm free to do what I want with the Death Note. He's bound to me in a way, but I'm sure he could sever the connection if he really wanted."

Death Note. A notebook that kills people.

"Can you prove it?"

Light turned to face you then, using his feet to swivel his chair around. "Prove what? That I'm Kira?"

You nodded.

He smiled. "Of course I can."

* * *

Prove it he did. He proved to you the murderer, the killer he was.

But you still didn't see him as evil. He was an Angel of Death of sorts. Maybe that wasn't the right term, you didn't know. But he was killing for the sake of peace, of bringing forward a safer, more just world.

Peace in our time.

Wasn't that what everyone wanted? Peace, security, concord in society. No more criminals, no more liars, murderers, sinners.

To be safe to walk alone at night, to not have to worry about locking the doors, to not be wary of what lurked in the shadows.

That's what people wanted.

That's what Kira gave them.