Ad Infinitum

Chapter 60: Epilogue

Infinity

Only in the eyes of love you can find infinity.
- Sorin Cerin

***

Thaddeus

It's been two and a half years since the last time I was here. I admit that I don't want to come to visit her, but I have to face the fact that she is long gone. I have to face that fear in order for me to move on.

I got off from the truck and looked around. It is a beautiful, sunny day. I remember when she wakes up so early to take her morning walks, enjoy her favourite time of the day, and feel that warm streak of sunshine touches her skin. It felt like it was just only yesterday.

With a heavy heart, I picked up the basket of fresh red roses I bought from her favourite bouquet shop and helped my daughters by giving them a hand to climb down from the truck. Sophia didn't took my hand and just jumped happily on the ground. Tamara, Sophia's twin, took my hand and stepped on the ground with grace. Tamara looked at me and smiled, then she took her sister's hand.

If only she could see them grow up into fine young ladies. I swear, she'll be proud of them. I sighed.

As soon as we saw the mausoleum to where she was laid to rest, Sophia tugged her sister to ran around the spacious grass area but Tamara stayed in her place. She holds her hands, put them behind her and watched her sister ran around with her favourite plush in delight.

"Tammie." I called her name and slowly turned around. "What's wrong, my love? You don't want to play with your sister?" I kneeled in front of her to see her on eye level.

She blinked her eyes twice at me and looked hesitant to say a word. Her eyes tells me she's afraid of something. She shook her head as I reached her little hand placed it on my palm and caressed it very lightly. I always does this gesture everytime she's afraid. "Daddy is here, sweetie. Don't be scared." She slowly points to one of the tombstones around the cementery.

"Oh, they are just tombstones, my love. They won't hurt you."

"I-I'm s-scared daddy." Her soft, little hands gripped my calloused hand tightly. She was almost in tears.

"I know, I know honey. I'm sorry." I gave her a reassuring smile and she nodded slowly. "Daddy is here, okay?"

That's why she was silent the moment we got off. She's scared of tombstones. I took her hand and together we climbed the stairs and opened the mausoleum. As we walked inside, Tamara stays back at my shadow. The moment we stopped walking, she starts to grip the hem of my pants.

"It's okay, Tammie. Daddy won't let go of you." I looked at her, caressing her short, silky black hair and smiled while she peeked at the large picture that was hanging on the wall. "See, she won't hurt you. She's happy to see you." A small smile crept unto Tamara's lips and I sighed. It's always been so precious to see her smiling face.

I placed the basket of roses on the grave and looked at her. I looked at Tamara and there she was, looking at the picture as well, curiously.

"Who's she, daddy?" I heard Sophia's voice echoed as she entered the room, her tiny footsteps echoing. I carried her into my arms and smiled at my daughter.

"She's mommy, Sophie." I replied. "She's our guardian angel."

"What's gadian angel?" Guardian angel. Sophia asked, her beautiful brown eyes twinkled full of curiousity.