"ARE YOU INSANE?" I scream over at Alex. He was across the hall from me, and I stormed over. "What were you thinking?"
"Eliza, please forgive me."
"No! I will not forgive you! Shouting to the whole school what we did, that's low. And now my sisters will be involved!" I say. When the Schuyler's are involved, everything turns to chaos.
Alex looks down at the floor as I cuss him out. How could he do this to me? We had been friends for a long time, and nothing like this ever happened. I knew him more than anyone. So how could this happen? After everything we've been through? Late night movies, Pizza Parties, and being drunk in the dark, was it all gone? And the very last thing I needed is for my sisters to arrive on the scene.
As if on cue, Angie and Peg came rushing out of literally nowhere.
"Alex, how could you?" Peggy yelled at him with a hate that I hadn't seen in her for a long time.
I could tell Angie wanted to beat the snot out of him, but she didn't. She cussed him out with so many words, I had to cover Peggy's ears. Angie finally stopped and Peggy pulled my hands off her ears. While doing this, she spots something on the floor. I knew what it was but I let her pick it up.
"Pregnancy test?" She said, bewildered. She scowled at Alex. Then looked at it. "Thank God! You tested negative! You're not pregnant!"
"Y-Your not p-pregn-nant?" Alex stammered in a low voice. I had enough. I just needed to be alone. Go away. Fade away.
"Yeah!" I snapped, and threw the pregnancy test at him. "Are you happy?"
Then I bolted away.
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I stare at the water below me. Such a peaceful river. I wish I was that way. But I'm not. I'm standing on a bridge. This is just too much to take. Too much to handle. Maybe I'd be better off that way. Then my sisters would have one less thing to worry about. And Alex, I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. I know you don't need to lose another person. I'm so sorry.
I climb the brick rail and stand on top of it. This is it. This is enough. I start falling forward. Then a sudden and violent force grabs my stomach and forces me backwards.
"WHAT THE HECK DO YOU THINK YOUR'E DOING?" Alex practically screamed at me. He had tackled me to the ground, knocking the wind out of me. He sat next to me, gasping.
"I don't know, Alex. I don't know anymore." I say in soft gasps, and break down into tears.
"Hey, it's alright." He looks at me. I look at him. I don't see love. I knew he loved me as a friend, but not real love. That's the thing. I love him. Yes. I said it. I love Alexander Hamilton. That's why I hate myself. I loved every minute of that night when we were drunk. I loved it. It makes me a terrible person. A fool. But I know he doesn't love me. He loves John. And I respect that. In fact, I was the one who passed him off to John oh so quickly. I hate myself for being a terrible person, an a terrible friend. For being so selfish.
But there's nothing I can do now. I'm helpless.
"Why," I say through tears, "why don't you find John?" I flash a smile at him.
"I suppose I should. After all, I love him." he says lovingly. I cringe and pretend I'm puking. He laughs. One day I'll tell him the truth.
"Go! What are you waiting for?" I push him. He gets up.
"You'll be ok?" He asks me.
"I'll be fine." I answer and he runs off.
Fine. Right. Fine.
I forgive you, Alex, but I will never forgive myself.
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ELizA's ChAPtEr!!!
YAY! sorry it took me forever to post this!
Big Thanks To: @MaxieYea
^Give em' a follow!^
LUV YOU ALL <3 XOXOXO
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Thinking About You (Lams modern college AU)
Fanfiction{COMPLETED} Alex can't believe his luck when John Laurens showed up at his school. He is instantly in love, and John grows to love himself to. But when Alex makes a very bad decision, will John forgive him or will he lose the one he loves? Lams. lam...
