Your Light (Tu Luz) [Joel Pimentel]

Chapter 27

"Gosh, , you look like crap." Mariana said as she sat down next to me in World History.

"Um, thanks a bunch, Rodriguez." I said.

Ever since I broke up with Joel, which is, 2 months ago, my world had been so numb, I couldn't sleep well or eat well. It almost like I'd lost a part of me I didn't know existed.

"Are you serious right now, Dhianna? Are you okay?" She asked, looking at me.

I looked at the same line in the textbook and I sighed.

"Of course, I am." I answered.

"You sure? You hesitated everytime I asked you that. And in case you don't realize, you've been reading and writing dark, gothic poems that give me goosebumps a lot. You also have been so quiet, it's hard to see you nowadays."

I smiled, a fake one. "I'm fine, Mari. Just a little tired. We're graduating, remember? I had tons of work to do."

She snickered, "Bullshit, just admit that you missed him, Dhianna. It's that easy."

Do I? Of course I do but I was also the one ending this so it's fair to say that I made stupid mistake every once a year, and this year I made the biggest one.

"No, I don't." I deadpanned.

She gave me a long look, one that she gives when she was trying to read someone through. One she gives when she was trying to look through one's soul.

"Dhianna..." She started.

"Stop, Mari. We should stop talking about this." I interrupted her and she shuts up, thankfully.

The whole day suddenly went like a blur and in a slow pace. I hadn't gotten to focus in class and it's taking its toll on me when I failed my first pop quiz on AP Lit and that worries Ms Aaliyah.

"Ms Gabriel, what is wrong with you? You never failed my class." She asked as everyone else in the class walked out of it.

"I'm sorry, Ms Aaliyah. I know it won't happen again and I promise you, it won't happen again." I assured her.

She nodded, "Better not, Ms Gabriel, or else you're not gonna graduate this year."

I smiled, "Thanks for the insight, Ms Aaliyah."

She smiled too. I don't know why but these past few days, I've been so sarcastic and mean.

I quickly walked out of the class, to the cafeteria. It was a long walk and I don't know how long I've been holding my breath but when I saw a mass of people inside a crowded room, I let go.

I walked to the place where my friends are sitting and they all looked at me. Their gazes are strong and I feel like grazing my skin.

Chris was the first one to switch place with Zabdiel, to sit next to me.

"Dhianna, what is wrong with you?" He asked and I looked at him.

I smiled, "Guys, why are you all so worried about me? I'm fine, look!"

"Dhianna." Zabdiel started, "..Doesn't mean you don't mop around or cry around, you are able to fool us in thinking you're okay when you know yourself you're not."

I laughed at that, sarcastically, "What bullshit are you saying, Zabdiel?"

The truth is that, I know, Zabdiel is making perfect sense in a way that made me feel something. Somehow he knows me more than I know myself.

He sighed, "We are so worried about you, Dhianna."

"Stop wasting your time worrying about me. Stop wasting all your time for me. I'm nothing but fine okay?" I assured them.

They gave me one long look again before settling into their food. I know I was being difficult but I have this urge to just shut everyone who are trying to help me out.

It's easy that way when no one cares.

I got used to the fact that I had no one more than I know.

I'm fine.

I'm fine.

I'm...

Not.