Rain and Outer Space ✔️

18

The next day, Renjun was back to normal. He even talked a lot at lunch, surprising both Chenle and Jeno. Jaemin just smiled at him the whole time. He knew what Renjun was going through was still there and it wasn't finished yet, but as long as the boy was happy (or just pretending to be), he's okay with it.

"Hey, are you guys free this Saturday?" Chenle asked out of the blue, after Renjun commented about the weather.

"I guess so," Jeno frowned.

"I'm free," Jaemin replied.

"Me too," Renjun followed.

"Great, because my parents won't be home again, and I'm lonely as hell. So, why don't we hang out at my place?"

"Sure! I'll bring some food," Jeno said.

"Jisung already told me that he's going to cook."

"As if that boy can cook!" Jaemin laughed, "Believe me, Jisung is pathetic when it comes to cooking."

"Oh?" Chenle asked, "He promised he'll cook tteokbokki for me, though."

"Then, let's pray that we won't get poisoned on Saturday," Jeno slapped his own knees.

×××

Once again, Jaemin sat on the cold ground of the rooftop after school. But this time, Renjun wasn't around. The boy went home with Chenle, whom he promised to buy ice cream with.

Jaemin could still feel the moment that occured yesterday, like it was only seconds ago. How Renjun broke down with a reason that remained unknown. Jaemin heart clenched in pain, what was Renjun going through? Jaemin had two encounter with this other, sadder, gloomier side of Renjun. None of them was a pleasant sight.

Jaemin was there when Jeno was wounded, a few years back, because of his parents' divorce. Jaemin was there when Jisung had his crisis, when he first joined the basketball team. None of them matched how Jaemin felt when he was with Renjun yesterday. Jaemin could feel that what Renjun kept to himself was something else he could not decipher.

He heard the door to the rooftop opened and footsteps coming closer. Moments later, Jeno sat next to him.

"We haven't talked a lot about what's really going in our life so," Jeno turned to Jaemin, "How are you doing?"

Jaemin shrugged, "Nothing major. How are you doing?"

"Life with my brother is so much easier," Jeno replied, "Can't help it. I missed my parents, sometimes."

"I missed mine too."

"Yeah, but your family are still together," Jeno chuckled bitterly.

"Technically, I live alone," Jaemin sighed, "My parents are still working until late night, and Hansol never came by."

Jeno stared at his best friend, "Your parents are still ignoring him?"

"I don't think they will want him to come back."

"Then... What about you?"

Jaemin fidgeted and bit his lower lip, "I don't know."

They sat in silence, both were drifted away by their own thoughts. Jaemin realized how fucked up their lives were. He had given up on praying and hoping that things would get better, because they wouldn't. Same thing with Jeno. In fact, Jaemin started to feel his answer to Renjun's question the previous day was complete bullshit. He wondered, why was he here? For a purpose? What purpose?

He might seem like an ordinary high school student, outside. But inside, he had fears, doubts, and not to mention problems too.

"Anyway, how long are you going to hide the fact that you're so whipped over Renjun?" Jeno asked with a playful smirk. He nudged Jaemin when the lad blushed like crazy.

"I'm not whipped," Jaemin pushed him away, chuckling, "I'm concerned."

"Sure you are, sweetcheeks."

"He's not in a stable condition to actually be involved with... this kind of feeling."

"Ah, I understand."

Jeno knew about the first time Jaemin found Renjun in the lavatory, that day. He didn't know about the previous day, though. He didn't know, and he wouldn't. Because Jaemin prefered to keep it a secret between him and Renjun.

"Do you think everything is going to be okay?" Jeno asked, his voice quivered a bit, "You. Me. Even Renjun. What the future holds for us?"

Jaemin slowly nodded, "Yeah. We'll be alright."

Even though Jaemin lost his faith, he still whispered inside, I hope we will be.

Written : March 20th 2018
Published : May 13th 2018
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