Dawn of a new Force

Chapter 11 - Intimates.

Kylo felt the slow, but sure, agony of her mother. As she had felt since the Falcon, he had felt the spirit of his mother, then a tremor in the force. He had always known that it would happen, he even thought it would be more sudden, in short, in an explosion or a blaster shot. He received this sensation as a curse. He would be really alone in the world. He knew that his mother had always loved him, no matter what he did, wherever he was. He had always loved her too, but too cowardly to admit that there could be another reality than the one he believed in.

He closed his eyes and enjoyed the silence at that moment. It had to be done, it was necessary because there would be no second time. He projected his mind to his mother. He sent her pictures of his happy childhood, the ones he remembered best. He, on his mother's lap in the Falcon's cockpit, was cursing Han after looping to amuse his son. The vision of her mother braiding her long hair in the morning, in front of a bay window overlooking the majestic jungle. She kissed her father at the bend of a door and throwing himself between them. A vision that he particularly appreciated. His mother's face above him while he was feverish, and his sweet words to comfort him.

He could not do more, talking to her would have been too difficult. She flashed back the vision she was taking at this moment of tipping: a wave of peace that surrounded her as she hugged her son for the very first time, Han crying with joy at his side.

Kylo felt the link break. It was all, and it was finished. He was alone now. Well... almost.

He turned and watched as Rey lay on the bed. He was embarrassed that she was there, but he could not put her back in the cell. He knew she was now at his mercy. Her defenses had fallen, he had only to maintain her despair and her fury, and she would soon have completely swung into the dark side. And he knew it was very difficult to get out.

She had been sleeping for two hours, she had collapsed from exhaustion as soon as she had been in her arms. He did not dare to move for fear that she wakes up. He was facing a deep question. Yes, he got what he wanted, his tipping. It had been fast, finally. And violent. But doing her apprenticeship would be tricky. He should not be guided by his own interests, but training as a master trains his apprentice. Would he have the strength to do it? Would he be able to guide her? Should he use the same methods that Snoke had used on him? He knew he could not. Since he knew her, he became more and more dilemmas every day, he felt his light struggle and it weakened him. But no, he could never physically torture her.

He decided to do nothing for the moment. He sat down in the armchair facing the bed, and watched as he caught hold of his grandfather and showed him the way forward, lost as he was.

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Rey opened her eyes with difficulty. They stung her, they were swollen by the tears she had shed. She felt a blanket resting on her and sat up on one elbow to see where she was. There was little light, but she quickly realized that she was neither in the Falcon nor in a cell. It was noticing Kylo at the end of the bed that she jumped and understood. 

- Why am I here? she asked hoarsely. 

Her throat hurt, and she remembered screaming. 

- I could not leave you alone. 

- Why? You are responsible for all that! Everything is your fault! How dare you pretend to be nice? If I'm here it's because you pushed me to the end! she spat, remembering what had happened. 

Rey was furious, against him, and against her. More than anything, she wanted to hurt him. Kylo got up and came to sit cautiously at the end of the bed where Rey had curled up. He would have liked to tell her so much, he would have liked her to understand his weakness for her. He would have liked her to feel that he was at that moment truly touched by her desperation, despite what his other side wanted to do with her. But nothing came out of his mouth. Because this relationship was so new to him. Except with his parents, love had never been just a word heard, not a reality or a tangible feeling. With Rey, could it be ...  

It was then that Rey reacted in the only way she imagined at that moment. She slapped him hard, and got up to go to the door. He did not bother to catch her, he remained stoic and knew she would not open. His heart burned with rage at being rejected, but he forced himself to calm down. She had to come to his side, as he had seen. Apprentice at a minimum, but Kylo had always aspired to the maximum. He controlled himself to keep talking. 

- Open this door! she ordered, turning around after trying to open it herself. 

- No, he said quietly, getting up in his turn. 

- Open! She shouted.

- You know you can not do it that way. 

- You disgust me! I disgusted myself, she finally spit. I do not recognize myself anymore, I want to go out or I'll go crazy! 

Kylo decided to move on because they were in a bind. Before she could struggle, he came to her and grabbed the fist she was raising to hit him. She held out her other hand to grab the lightsaber, but he had been careful to leave it in his personal armory. He blocked his right arm behind his back as he grabbed his left hand and held it back as well. 

- Let go, he said to her. We had a vision, we will be together, in the dark side. 

- No! She shouted. That's not what I saw. And I saw Ben. You are a monster, you are an animal! I would rather be dead than be there with you! 

Kylo released his arms instantly. He stepped back and looked at her with a rage that had set his eyes ablaze. She, in turn, received a slap, with a restrained force, but which cut off her breath of astonishment. 

- Never say that again! He shouted. Yes I am a monster, I have never tried to pretend otherwise! I can kill you on the spot ... 

- Then do it! she told him defiantly. Do not hesitate, really. 

- Idiot! See more, you do not have to be ashamed to be human! The Jedi, even the Sith, are not humans! They are liars who want us to believe that emotions are bad. The rebels and their freedom that brings chaos ... Do not you understand that you will be able now to free us from these burdens, to write the history of the galaxy! We can bring peace and order, you know that's what I want!

- At the cost of freedom! She spat. Your idea of ​​peace is dictatorship. I prefer to fight to the death in these conditions. 

- Then I'll keep you locked up until the end. And I will crush one by one all those who will try to counter me. 

He went pacing, but the rage bubbled in him and overflowed. It had to go out, so he took the vase that sat on the console and threw it against the wall opposite. He waved the armchair, and finally he was submerged. He raised his hand and drew Rey to him. His gloved hands came to seize his head. Rey could not stop the gesture, and soon she felt his mouth on her. The force of the kiss that he imposed on her disgusted her, but in the second that followed she felt a wave of heat flood it and surrendered to it, for a moment suspended. Then he pulled away from her as violently as he had drawn her, and without a word out of the room. Rey remained there, unable to move, regaining consciousness. Two Praetorian guards then entered the room without a word, handcuffed her, and led her to the elevator, which began it descent. Alone with her guards, she had the bitter taste of that kiss, and the shame that would never leave her again.