You make me ache

Ch30: Pain killers and Memory cards.

Tyler's POV.

Once back at the apartment, I lead Troye out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. With his body shaky, I help lower him onto the bed so that he can sit up right rather than letting him continue to struggle to stand.  I check that he is okay before I release his shoulder and wander over the wardrobe. Looking for something he can sleep in, I begin to rummage through his t-shirts.

"Can I wear one of yours?" he asks, his voice thick with exhaustion. I smile at him before quickly finding my softest t-shirt and walking back over towards him.

"Right, carefully lift your arms up- can you do that babe?" I ask him, worried for the raw stitches that adorn his stomach. He tentatively tries my request, wincing only slightly as he finds success in his movement. He is wearing my sweater that I had given him to wear at the hospital after his own t-shirt had to be cut away from his body and I gently tug at the hem, lifting it upwards.

"I'm sorry" I mutter, grimacing as I try not to hurt my tender boyfriend.

"Don't be" he murmurs back once the sweater is over his head. I lean down and give him a soft kiss, caressing his cheek as I do so.

"Arms?" I prompt him, pulling away from our short kiss and ravelling my t-shirt into my hands ready to dress him.

"You don't have to help me you know"

"I know." I smile at him, pulling the soft fabric down, being careful of his bandages. "But I want to"

"Thank you Tyler" he replies, lowering his arms once more. I shake my head at him and quickly tell him that he has no need to thank me. Tonight has terrified me- I know that I can never lose this beautiful man and I am looking after him for my own benefit just as much as for his. He smiles weakly at me but I can see the pain he is trying to bite back.

"Another fifteen minutes and it'll be time for you to have some more painkillers babe. But first let's get rid of these" I tell him, stroking his fabric covered thighs and wishing I could do more to help.  My fingers begin to fiddle with his button and he softly collapses his back to the mattress, meaning he only has to lift his hips for me to remove his trousers. I untangle them from his ankles and place them on top of my sweater that I have already discarded.

"Want sweats or are you happy just like that?" I ask him, seeing his worn-out state and knowing that it is unlikely that he will want to move much more.

"I'll be fine like this" he tells me, his eyes shut, ready to surrender to sleep. I lean forward and stroke his cheek, causing his long lashes to flutter back up, allowing me to see his beautiful blues.

"Okay but if you get cold, you have to promise you'll wake me so I can help you change" I say as I stand up straight again.

"I won't get cold; I have you to keep me warm"

"Always, but still, let's get you under this duvet. Do you think you can slide in?" I ask him, fearful that the movement will cause him more discomfort but knowing that he cannot sleep sideways across the bed and without a cover. He nods, but grimaces as he slowly changes position so that his head finds the pillow. Empathetically wincing at his obvious discomfort, I help lift up the duvet as his weak body slips underneath. He tries to whisper his thanks to me but I hush his lips with my finger, not wanting to hear his unnecessary words.

"I'm going to go and get your pills ready, I'll be back in a minute. Don't move" I tell him as I tuck the duvet in around him.

"I was planning on dancing and then going for a run" he jokes back, mocking my protectiveness. I smile back at him, glad to hear his playful tone but I still cannot resist the urge to make him promise me that he will not try to move whilst I am in the kitchen.