In My Remains

The body bends until it breaks

A/N: Hello all! How are you? :) So! Plot bunnies attacked. And now I have two new story ideas. It's not fair!! How can I ever have enough time to write all that I want! xD Dammit! So thank you all for reading my stories and voting and commenting. You don't know how much you mean to me <3 Oh and ideas are also welcome. Even when they make the plot bunnies go crazy... Lol.

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Next morning started as usual. Mike woke up before Brad and went to make the breakfast. His mind was racing, things appearing that he thought he never would even have to figure out. He was still uncertain, and didn't fathom that Brad could actually really love him. And if it really was true, what then? The man was still married. Rob was still the only one who new. It would destroy the band if the others would find out. And it's not like they could actually be together anyway. Even if there wouldn't be Elisa and even if the band would accept them.

His previous happy, calm mood turned to gloominess. He tried to ignore the feeling, cause it still wouldn't change things. No matter what, he couldn't abandon Brad. To push him away. Especially not now.

Finishing with the breakfast he glanced at his phone and realized it was the shower day. He tried to keep it on certain days so he wouldn't forget it. And now it probably would be more awkward than before, just in a different way. Which made him think yet again other stuff that would have never before even crossed his mind.

And there the guitarist was again standing in the doorway, like usually.

"Morning. Just a second", he glanced over his shoulder at the other.

Brad nodded and went to sit down in the couch. He was on the edge but couldn't understand why. Sure things had changed between them, but it was supposed to be to the better.

"Again not talking?", Mike frowned pouring the coffee.

Brad shook his head shifting. "No."

"Talking or not talking?", the half Asian brought the cups to the coffee table.

"You know what I mean", Brad rolled his eyes and took his coffee.

"Maybe. How did you sleep?", Mike talked while he want back to fetch the plates. French toast again today.

"Fine. The cast is annoying", the guitarist took a more comfortable position on the couch.

"Not that long to go anymore. Which leads to the thing that... today should be a shower day. You fine with it or... I can always call Rob to help. Or Chester if that's better for you", the other sighed and sat down next to him. The choking feeling was still there, bugging him.

"Nothing has changed", Brad started to cut the toast keeping his eyes on the plate.

The emcee glanced at him from the corner of his eye. "I would disagree on that."

"Yeah but... Not that it would make the shower any more awkward than it was before", Brad mumbled.

"Sorry. You know I suggested back then that one of the guys should do it", the other tilted his head wondering.

The guitarist sighed. "No Mike, I meant for you. I know it has to be done. But it would be more awkward... well to me if some of the guys would do it."

"Right. Yeah. You probably could sense how I felt each time. God we're such a mess. And I... I still feel weird that you... say you feel the same towards me. You know?", Mike turned to face him, crossing his legs.

Brad got lost in his thoughts for a while before he opened his mouth again. "So you want me to prove it?"

"No! Brad, god! Didn't mean that! It takes time for me to understand it. You were silent for a long time, and it was such contrast to your normal self. And then add there the physical aspect and how messed up I was cause I almost lost you. And then my feelings added on top of that. And next you kiss me. And then you tell me you love me back. So now... It's like... I know it's a good thing, even if it doesn't lead anywhere. But the thing is this all has happened so fast. My brains can't keep up", Mike raked his hair still feeling so lost.