Promise • 전정국 (DISCONTINUED)

38 | Messy

"I feel the sharp reality more every day."

•••

Tissues.

Most people don't bother to carry them. For others, it can be one of their most prized possessions. It's funny how much a simple little piece of fabric can help in big situations. How much they can clean up if a mess is made. Regardless of being thin and very lightweight. It's unfortunate you can't reuse the same one.

Tissue after tissue. They continuously fell onto the sheets of my bed below me along with some light tears.

I don't like crying for multiple reasons. I hated how my nose became stuffy to a point where no matter how hard I tried to blow it, it didn't help. I hated how puffy my eyes became. I hated the fact that no matter how many times I mentally told myself to stop, I couldn't.

My mother came in a few minutes later, sympathy on her face as she helped collect all of the fallen tissues, throwing them into the little garbage can in my bedroom. She sat down beside me and by instinct, I rushed to her side, embracing her. I felt her hands start to run up and down my back, drawing circles, soothing me in a way that she did when I was a child.

"I'm proud of you."

I looked up at my mother, confused by her words.

She giggled.

"I'm not saying that I'm happy you two aren't together. I'm just praising you for making a decision that a lot of people wouldn't have made. You spotted a problem and you decided to do something about it."

"Not all by myself. Believe me, I had to get a lot of advice from my friends for me to be sure of what I wanted to do."

"Then you have a great system of friends. I'm glad you listened to them. Don't think this is the end between you and him. All relationships have bumps and it is very much possible to get through them. Your father and I had many fights before, but with communication, we were able to figure a lot of things out. So, what I'm basically going to tell you is," She paused and placed her hand on my thigh. "Don't be like little kids and ignore each other. Talk. It helps. Trust me. I know you probably want him to be the first one to make a move but it's okay for you to try and take charge too."

Taking in my mother's words, I smiled, thanking her for her time in helping me through my 'breakup', if that's what you wanted to call it. She invited me for some homemade ice cream as we rewatched episodes of Grey's Anatomy.

I turned to look at her when I saw that the show had been put on pause. With the remote control in her hand, she sighed.

"Y/N, honey, can I ask you something? You might not be ready to answer it but I would at least like you to be honest."

I nodded hesitantly, my mind forming up any question that she could possibly be wanting to ask me. "I can do that."

"So, tell me,"

"Do you love him?"

༺༻

Jungkook's POV:

Regret. Frustration. Anger. Sadness. Pain. All these things I kept pent up inside me as I lay on my bed, eyes darting to the ceiling, arms stretched out beside me. Endless thoughts about Y/N flooded through my head.

I wanted to see her.

I wanted to talk to her.

I wanted to hear her voice.