I felt someone’s lips on my nose. Then on my cheek. Then on my forehead. “Sorry”, I heard someone whisper and I opened my eyes to find Louis infront of me. His eyes were teary and I gasped. “Louis, what is it?!”, I asked shocked and brushed my thumb over his cheek.
I blushed as I recognized how close we were to each other. I made a move backwards so I wouldn’t do anything I regreted and almost fell out of the bed – if there hadn’t been Louis to catch me.
”Harry!”, he shouted and grabbed my waist, pulling me close again.I looked into his blue eyes and gulped. He was so beautiful although he must feel like crap. He hardly cried. Only if something was bothering him hard. “What is it?”, I asked again and he stood up.
“I’m sorry”, he said again. I saw in his eyes that he was worrying about something so I felt the urge to comfort him. I sat straight up but I still felt dizzy. My throat was dry and I needed to drink somethink – but first of all I needed Louis to tell me what was wrong. “What are you sorry for?”
He looked at the ground. “I… I wanted to tell ypou something but I think it’s a bad idea. And now… I wanted to go without saying goodbye properly… That’s what I’m sorry for.” He took on his sneakers and ran a hand through his hair. He met my gaze and looked so… sorrowful. He sighed and made fists out of his hands. “I’m sorry, Harry”, he said once again, grabbed his jacket and ran out of the room.
Again I sat up and tried to leave the bed but my knees were too weak for my plans. I grabbed the desk and the chair Louis had sat on yesterday so I wouldn’t fall and tried to push myself forward. Somehow, I really don’t know how, I managed to reach the door and pushed it open. I looked to the left and to the right of the hallway but there was no sight of Lou.
A nurse came along. “What are you doing out here, Mr Styles?”, she asked, grabbed me under my armpits and dragged me into the room again. I neither had the power nor the will to protest her. I lie down on my bed again and stared at the ceiling.
What had just happened?
What did I do wrong?
“Do you need anything?”, the nurse crossed my thoughts and I shook my head. “If you get bored, here are the newspapers from yesterday. We can bring you some older, too, so you can bring your brain to the point we are right now.”
Again I shook my head. I cleared my throat. It stillw as dry.
She handed me a glass of water with a straw inside. She put it on the desk next to my bed and left. Okay, again, what had just happened? What had I done so Louis left like this? He had wanted to tell me something… But then he didn’t. What was it?
I sobbed but no tears came out of eyes.
I hid my face in my pillow and wanted to be at home, just be left alone. I didn’t want to see anybody, although I knew the boys would come here today. I was awake and so was Danielle.
I touched the top of my nose and imagined still to feel Louis’ lips there. The next second I imagined to feel it on my cheek and then on my forehead. As I dared to open my eyes I saw… there was nobody. Only some dust flying around in the air.
I lie there, unable to move or to speak. I lived, more than a year, in the thought Louis was dead. Although I was unconscious I were able to feel. I had never heard his voice. He was never there. He never cared about me. Maybe he left because he had to see Eleanor. Maybe they made up. Or maybe there was already another girl… Maybe he had managed to tell this one girl about his feelings.
I grabbed the newspapers on my side. Maybe there was something about him in the newspapers. And, indeed, I found an article about One Direction on page thirty-two.
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Gotta Be Lou (A Larry Stylinson Fanfic)
FanfictionHarry can’t believe himself. Since he introduced this girl, Eleanor, to his best friend Louis he is jealous about what he tells about her. He wants to be her – to be the one Louis fancies. But he has never felt like loving boys, He is confused about...