infidelity | maya + farkle

NINETEEN.

HIS POINT OF VIEW

as soon as my fist impacted lucas's face, i regretted it, but it was too late to say sorry. i shook my hand a bit.. i never thought punching someone could hurt so much. he brought his hand to his nose and realized he was now bleeding. seconds later he looked away from his hand and made eye contact with me. i was soon pinned against the wall harshly. the sudden impact made me wince in pain.

"i could break you!" he growled and my eyes widen as i looked him in the eyes. i had never seen him so angry yet here he stood; his nose a bloody mess and his eyes filled with anger directed solely at me. the schools quarterback was ready to ruin me and-

"lucas!"

"farkle!"

maya's voice was enough to stop lucas from pounding my face in with his fist.  we both looked in the direction of her voice and she stood there along riley. the music had been stopped and it felt like we were stuck in time. even though we were surrounded by so many people.. the four of us knew the truth.

lucas let me go and looked around at the spectators watching what was going on. everyone was silent. sure, they had seen him get aggressive on the field, but lucas was almost like a bear to them. cute and cuddly.. till you provoke him. i had been the one to provoke him or poke the bear as the saying goes.

the night had began fun. when i first arrived, he had actually greeted me even though i could feel the tension between us. i didnt blame him though. i was the one in the wrong, but i had thought we both mutually knew that without saying it.

but somewhere on my fifth shot.. i stopped caring. i didnt know where maya was even though she had told me to go without her and she would meet me here. i didnt wanna speak to riley on the mere chance that i might try to charm her or even worse break down in apology that i hurt the first person i ever loved.

was she the first person?

or was it maya?

the more i thought the more my head hurt, but i laughed along with people i didnt care about. drank drinks with them that i wouldnt choose to drink normally. lucas caught my attention when i was mid chuckle and he was talking to riley.

my eyes widen and normally i wouldnt care, but this was not normally. i could still walk correctly as i approached the two of them.

"hey." i greeted both of them. riley's eyes widen as she realized it was me. lucas looked over at smiled at me.

"hey, are you having fun?" lucas asked with his usual dream boy smile. i noticed he had a cup but it was filled with soda. i had never actually seen lucas drink, but that didnt stop his football buddies from stocking his house like a liquor store for the party.

"yeah, i am, actually." i lied and he nodded his head. "so.. what were you two talking about?"

"why?" riley laughed uneasily which may have just been in my head, but i was more intrigued to what lucas's response would be.

"we were just talking about one of our classes together. riley helped me with math and she is an angel." he commented which made her blush. i rolled my eyes at his words.

"i know." i had said the words inside my head, but i didnt think i had said them out loud. riley furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at me but i looked back at lucas.

"yeah.." he slowly started as he weirdly looked between me and riley. "i dont know why you let her go."

that sly comment was enough to push me off the edge. i watched as he brought his cup to his lips.

"i dont know why you let maya go either." i knew i shouldnt have said such words, but i didnt care. lucas looked over at me slowly then back towards riley. she had an uncomfortable look on her face at the mere mention of maya.

"dont talk about her." he muttered as he looked away. i felt my whole body get hot as i stood there beside him. the small confrontation was soon to be over, because lucas turned to walk away but i couldnt let him. something inside me, couldnt let him.

"when was the last time you two were together?" i asked. riley's eyes widen at my question. lucas stopped in his tracks as if daring me to continue. riley slowly stepped away from us and that's when i finally admitted it. "because we were together the night before."

that was how it started.

HER POINT OF VIEW

i was a little more late than i wanted to be to lucas's party, but a part of me didnt wanna go either. lucas was never the type of person to have a random party so it just threw me off. i greeted a few people who were outside as i began to open the front door.

my eyes widen when i noticed a crowd had formed towards the living way as everyone tried to get a peak at what was happening. i frowned in confusion as i tried to push through some people to see what they were in awe about.

my heart stopped at the sight of lucas holding farkle up against the wall. my mouth felt dry as i looked beside me and noticed riley was frozen in fear at the sight.

"lucas! farkle!" i practically yelled as loud as i could. they both stopped. i could at least breathe but seeing lucas's bloody nose made me wanna cry. "what is wrong with you two.." i calmly stated as i looked between the two.

i turned on the heel of my shoes and began to walk outside to the front yard. i pushed past a few people not even caring to say sorry.

"maya!" i could hear lucas's voice call to me but i didnt care.

i loved both of them. i just couldnt imagine them doing something so dangerous or childish.

"maya!" lucas said once more but this time he grabbed my hand. he looked at me with a soft smile, but i pulled away.

"why?" was all i could say as we made eye contact. i grabbed the towel in his hand and began to clean his face, wiping all the blood off. he didnt respond for a few seconds.

"why?.." he began to say. "why!" he repeated once more. "why him.."

"im sorry, lucas!" i yelled. "i fucked up. i know i did. i cheated on you. i caused my best friend to cheat on the girl that he was dating!" my voice had risen louder than i expected and people were now paying attention to me. i looked over at riley and farkle who were standing on the porch looking at the two of us.

"maya-" he began to say, but i quickly cut him off.

"i dont understand why you wanna be with me.." i managed to say even though my voice cracked. "i hurt you! i didnt just cheat on you.. i fell in love too."

his expression softened at my words but it felt like my heart was on thin ice. i looked over at farkle and noticed his eyes were focused on me.

"what?" he whispered.

"so im sorry." i whispered. "im sorry that im a horrible person who doesnt deserve you." my vision was becoming cloudy due to the tears forming. i pulled away from his grasp and looked at everyone. all their surprised expressions and i could hear the whispers between a few people.

"you were right." i looked towards riley. "no one wants someone like me."

i looked at lucas one more time but before he could say anything i turned and walked away. "forgot about me.." i wiped the tears that had fallen on my cheeks. a part of me wanted to pretend as if i had never hurt lucas as if the thing with farkle had not happened. but i couldnt. i'd be lying to myself and to everyone around me.

i loved farkle, i truly did, i loved lucas too.

but if i was in love with lucas, i wouldn't have been with farkle.

because you don't do that to the person you are in love with.