Broken(a VA fanfiction) (COMPLETE)

18

I set in the steps of the old house waiting for the sun to set so no one can see my tears.
Everything went on like nothing ever happened in my house.
Every time they talked about the wedding I would think about how different roses responses would be.

Yeva disappeared after telling us what ever she had said.

'The broken can't burn' or something. It didn't make sense. Nothing ever made sense that Yeva said but it was like this time she was trying to kill me.
I always knew loving rose had consequences but it was always bitter sweet it was never pure darkness. I wanted to love her but I can't. I looked at the ring on my finger and it seemed to burn into my skin.
Love.

Love and protection.
That's what the ring stood for. That is the promise I made to pav. Even though I know I can never love her. And I know I'm the hurting her emotions. How can I protect something I'm destroying?!
It was easy to observe how much me not being excited about the wedding and seeing rose had affected her.

Rose.
I know rose wouldn't have stayed. Heck, she was saying how she was happy for pav and me, but why did yeva have to sent her away?
It's selfish but couldn't she just stay another second?
I just need a second.
I know rose moved on. And I know things are so so different now. But how can I move on if she's the only thing I can think of?
She had sent me a massage on my phone a few hours after leaving but it felt so much like she was leaving forever I couldn't even read it. Still it was there on my notification but I can't make myself read it.
Maybe when I'm ready? But I know I'll never be ready.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't even realize that yeva had come back and set next to me until she put her hand though my hair like she did when I was little and needed to be calm down.

"Yeva" I said as I put my head in her lap while she continued to do gestures that calmed me down.

"Did I ever question anything you did?" I asked.

"Never"

"Then can I question you today? I really need to know" I said my voice cracking.

"I never said you couldn't question me" she said giving me a soft smile.

"Why did you tell rose to go away? What did you mean by the broken can't burn? Why sent her away when you know I-i-" I fell silent. Not saying the words that actually came to my mind.

When you know I can't live without her. When you know I love her. When you know I would do anything to get her to stay.

"Dimka, did she tell you everything she did in the last 3 years? The political moves? The number of kills? The darkness?"

"Yes"

"And do you think she would have been able to do all the same things if she was with you?"

"no. But how is she broken?"

"Dimka, did she seem anything like your roza?"

I blushed a little at the thought of my grandmother know so much about my personal life but then thought about her question.

"No. Not much. But people change"

"No my boy, people don't change. People's moral and perspective change. She's not the same. And that's because she has been though so much. It broke her. Dimka, if she stayed it would just hurt both of you. Because she can't love anyone if she doesn't even know who she is." Yeva explained with sadness in her voice.

"There's so much she needs to do. Don't hold her back. You can't force love. If it's there it'll always be there. Love her by letting her go." She then gave a genuine smile and patted my head.