Becoming Hers

53

*LEXI'S POV*
The next couple of weeks went by and nothing seemed too out of the ordinary, no one really treated me any differently which I was so grateful for, I would have hated it if everyone acted as if I was crazy and about to crack at any moment. If anything, that would have made the situation so much worse because it would have felt like people were changing themselves just to keep me from breaking anymore than I already had. It almost felt like everything that had been going on was all just a dream.

I took my meds that were prescribed to me and steered clear of alcohol. Therapy had been introduced into my life. I started to become more dedicated to my studies, it was probably a little late for that knowing that I'd flunked pretty much all school, but I was getting older and I needed to take things more seriously. It was honestly a miracle that I had actually finished. My exams were over and I'd definitely failed a few of them, but Gracie had motivated me to revise and I believe that I did alright on the rest of the exams. I just hoped that was enough to get me into university.

Not long after I was discharged from the hospital I received the news that I'd won the short story competition which meant that the school would get money donated for the English department, but also, I was awarded fifty pounds in book vouchers and one-hundred pound cash prize, which was pretty awesome. Due to me winning the competition, I was awarded a scholarship on a writing course at De Montfort University in Leicester. It wasn't the best Uni, it pretty much accepted anyone who applied and the standards weren't as high as other universities, but it's not like I was a model student. Not knowing what to do, I decided to just ignore it for a while.

I had started writing things in my spare time as well, mostly stories but a few poems and songs too. I stopped doing things to hurt myself and started expressing my thoughts and feelings into words. I hadn't showed them to anyone but I planned on finishing a bunch of things and showing them all to Gracie. I didn't want to give her a half finished story, because what good would that be? How would she have known if there was a happy ending? She knew I was writing, and she was happy for me, she said that it must have been helping me because I seemed a lot more relaxed recently instead of the anxious and stressed version of me.

Writing had kind of become my new passion, although I loved basketball and all of the people I'd met through competing. I worked so hard that year, training nearly everyday but it wasn't something I wanted a career in. Don't get me wrong, I wanted basketball in my life, but I wasn't as passionate about it anymore. I started playing as a way to relax and focus on something other than school and everything that was going on. But then basketball became something I needed an escape from because there was so much pressure and drama, and I didn't want that to happen again. So I decided to only play occasionally, so it would feel like more of a choice.

I wanted to write. I wanted to create new universes that I could escape to whenever I needed. I'd always liked writing, English was the only lesson I ever really tried in, except gym of course, I took notes in the lesson, but I didn't go as far as spending hours on homework.

Results day came around extremely quickly which made my nerves increase rapidly. I logged into UCAS and soon found out that I had achieved the grades to get into De Montfort to study creative writing. I wasn't overjoyed but I couldn't figure out why. It was what I wanted wasn't it?

Gracie had got into Kingston University, in London, which was kind of weird, because that was where I grew up. At first I didn't know why she wanted to study fashion because she was an academic genius but then she said to me 'I want to have a career in fashion and art, just because I could do something else that shouldn't stop me from doing something I love' She had a passion for art and I was so proud that she chose to do something she wanted to, instead of something academic just because she was extremely smart. She just wanted to be happy and I loved that about her.