Lovely || Demi Lovato

Only Used

| • Chapter 7 - Only Used • |

A M E L I A

For the first time in a long while, I felt free.

The only thing I cared about was the music and the meaning of everything.

I felt at peace and I loved every second of it because I knew it wouldn't last long. Nothing ever lasts.

"So..." Demi trails off as she finished singing 'Wildfire'. "There's this beautiful girl here tonight and it's her birthday!" Demi squeals, looking at me, giving me a wide smile.

"Ugh." I heard Amber groan.

"So what if I bring her out to sing a song with me?!" Demi suggests as the crowd screams.

Oh fuck no.

"C'mon Amelia." Demi coos.

I shake my head frantically, feeling my carefree mood drop instantly.

I hate crowds or attention.

It's bad enough I'm in the same building as twenty-thousand other people, I'm not about to have everyone look at me.

"I'll go!" Destiny chirps as she skips onto the stage.

Demi's happy face instantly drops as she frowns at me.

Yet another person I've disappointed.

Well done Amelia.

"O-okay, so we'll sing 'Skyscraper'." Demi sighs, seemingly put off.

"Wait, can we sing 'Cool for the Summer'? That's the only song I know." Destiny whispers not so quietly into the microphone.

"Change of plans, we'll sing 'Cool for the Summer'!" Demi is clearly uncomfortable with the cocky teen, the crowd even quieted down, a gentle buzz of confusion spreading ironically, like a wildfire.

After they finish singing- well, Demi finishes singing and Destiny finishes wailing, my mood just doesn't change.

I should've sucked it up and went out there, instead... well, this happened.

Demi looked so disappointed though.

After Demi is left alone on stage, I just couldn't enjoy the show anymore so I went to the bathroom.

No one asked where I was going or who I was, I'm starting to think I'm invisible.

As I make it to the bathroom, I instantly check my phone, in hopes of reaching a message from my father but I'm met with nothing.

Figures.

I set my phone down on the sink and just take deep breaths for a while.

That's good though. The less people remember about me, the easier it will be for me to leave.

But I can't leave.

The life I've been given is a punishment for killing my own mother.

My momma.

I jump when Jace, Amber and Destiny all walk into the bathroom.

"You've made us look pathetic!" Amber exclaims.

"Yeah, making me sing a song I don't even know." Destiny hisses.

"I didn't make you do anything." I shrug.

"You didn't walk out!" She exclaimed.

"But she didn't tell you to come out instead, did she?" I ask frustrated.

"I was doing you a favour, bitch, at least now people think you can sing... Eww! People thought I was you." She gags as I roll my eyes.

"If I'm such a nuisance I don't understand why you hang out with me." I mumbled hoping for some peace and quiet although I know they will never, ever, leave me alone. Apparently quitting isn't in their job descriptions.

All three stayed quiet, much like I expected them too. I don't think they realize I'm starting to understand they only ever talk to me if they want something. That I'm only ever asked if I want to hang out when they want to go to a concert or meet a celebrity.

I'm only ever used.

"We have to get back out before Demi thinks you fucking killed yourself in the bathroom, idiot! Who the fuck just disappears for this long? You're so stupid sometimes, Amelia." Jace exclaimed. And honestly, despite his harsh insults, I knew that idea could very possibly be coursing through Demi's mind.

"I know."

I walked past them hearing Destiny and Amber snicker. Jace, well I could practically feel him rolling his eyes at me.

I should have just given them the tickets.

As we walked back into the stage room, Demi was giving her typical speech before Warrior, and despite the fact that I've watched her preform this live on YouTube millions of times, I still felt the salty tinge hit my eyes as I teared up.

"So, the girl I brought up on stage, that wasn't Amelia. But, I'd really like to dedicate this song to that special birthday girl. You're stronger then they make you think, sweetheart." Demi's eyes caught mine as we went back to our seats and I couldn't help the tear that fell down my cheek.

Before Demi started singing at the piano, her hand feverishly scribbled something down, before it was handed to Max and something was whispered to him.

Demi smiled at me, before beginning to sing, maintaining eye-contact throughout the entirety of the song. My eyes were flooding now as I'm sure my entire face was damp.

"You're so pathetic, Amelia! Look, you're embarrassing us!" Jace hissed as he smacked my head noticing my picture was displayed on the screens.

Demi's smile dropped as she watched him hit me, and then watched Amber roll her eyes and turn her body away from my own.

God, they need to stop!

No, I need to stop.

I need to stop breathing. That would save us all so much trouble. Save the world so much air. Save them the embarrassment.

Nobody would miss me if I were gone. I'm already invisible.

To so many people, it's already like I'm dead.

Isn't that just lovely?

Isn't it great always being alone?

Isn't it just lovely, I don't even feel welcomed in my home?

•••
Y'all, okay, sooooo, we're changing updates to Saturday's now, it's less stressful because we're both in HS and literally I'm drowning in mountains of homework so if anyone wants to do it for me😂😂 anyways, tomorrow's Julia's birthday so like, wish her a happy birthday and shit because she AWESOME, and usually the one to edits the chapters so I'm sorry if there's mistakes, I tried my best.

Also, the chapter name makes no sense but like idk😭

• kyr