I'm trying to help

Councilor

the other day i had to go and see a councilor about my depression and self-harm, i was so scared.

i cried and freaked out the night before, i couldn't breath. my mum had to try and calm me down.

I kept waking up more than normal that night because of the nightmares. i'm used to getting nightmares, as i have then every night. i normally wake up about twice a night but that night i woke up 5 or 6 times.

in the morning i freaked out again, crying, screaming a little, shaking and out of breath.

i was so scared, i was scared about the questions, the person, their personality, them judging me and a load of other things.

I was soo scared.

Before i knew it, it was time to go and visit the councillor.

I got to the doctors and took a seat for 5 minutes until a woman about 50 ish came out and called me in.

I went in with my mum and we sat down. she introduced herself first and what her job is and how she could try and help me.

then she went onto the questions. she asked why I started, what i use, how long for, where too and other questions.

she was actually okay, I'm not a person who likes to actually talk about how I feel face to face.

this is why i like to type it, I chose to type and publish it here becuase while I'm going through a rough patch of my life I can also try and help people.

I haven't come here to slag people off, I'm doing this so I can release everything I'm thinking instead of cutting. Sometimes it works and others it doesn't.

I haven't done this for attention or sympathy, I'm here to help people and to tell people my story so they don't make the same mistakes as I have.

councilors are good people,  they want to help you get better, some of them have had depression, selfharmed or any other mental illness,  so they know what they are talking about.

if you need someone to talk to im always here and happy to help.

Stay Strong Beautiful People ♡ ♥ I love you all :) xx