Double Sided

Tattoos

"Tyler, do we have someone to work tomorrow?" I asked when I got home, Jenna was following close behind me.

"Yeah, Mark will be there, why?"

"I have to go back to the tattoo parlor."

"Oh yeah, what did you get done?" He asked.

"I can't show you yet." I pulled at my sweatshirt sleeves.

"Okay, Mr. Secrets." He laughed.

"Whatever." I joined him. "I'm going to take a quick shower then hang in my room if you need me."

"Alright." I left the room with Jenna by my side.

"If you want to hangout in my room until I'm done in the shower, you can." I opened the door for Jenna.

"Okay." She sat down on my bed.

*trigger warning. Scars and mentions of sh*

I grabbed some clothes then went to the bathroom. I started the water then got undressed. "What the hell?" I looked down at my hips where there were fairly prominent scars. I got in the shower and quickly cleaned up. I got some shampoo and started washing my hair. "Ah!" I pulled my hand away, I had forgotten about the tender spot on the left side of my head. I gently finished then got out and dried off. I slid into my boxers and sweatpants the went into my room.

"Jenna?"

"Yeah?" She was playing on her phone on the bed.

"Can I ask you something? I don't know if the real you knows about it or if you are the real you, honestly I'm confused about that."

"Yes you can ask me anything." She laughed, "and I am not the real me, I just know everything about the real me and well, the real everyone."

"Okay. I was about to get in the shower and I noticed something... weird." I rolled down the side of my pants.

"I did know about those." She frowned. "Sit down." I did as I was told. "You use to cut. The real you did."

"Why?"

"You didn't have a great childhood, Josh. I mean you're family was and is great, but you were severely bullied, especially through high school. You hated yourself, it was the time that really tested our friendship. You were so locked up in your own mind. That's when you met Tyler, he helped you so much. He pulled you out of it, and you helped him out of it too."

"Oh." I felt my eyes fill with tears and a lump form in my throat. "So did you ever-" I couldn't get out the rest of my sentence but Jenna knew what I meant.

"No, I didn't. But I saw you when you did once, it was the last time you ever did too. Tyler and I were both at your house because you were having a really bad night. When we got to your house your mom let us in. We went up to your room and you were no where to be seen. Tyler knew exactly what you were doing and ran to the bathroom, you let him in. You were crying, I could see the heartbreak in your eyes, the pain you were experiencing. It was the worst day of my life." She choked.

"Is that how you found out?"

"I knew already. I just hadn't ever seen you like that before. It made it really real for me."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, you are doing so much better now. You are five years clean." Jenna smiled at me.

"That's awesome. Am I proud of myself for it?"

"I think so. You don't talk about it much, but you are much happier now. We can all tell."