Dear Diary ↬ NoMin

seventeen.

Thanks for 500 reads :))
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I left my lips on his for at least 10 seconds before a hand grabbed my face and enforced the kiss even more. I couldn't pull away because of Jeno's hand on my face. I didn't want to pull away anyways I wanted to stay like this. His tongue slipped into my mouth immediately having me pull away from the kiss. I turned to the other side and smiled to myself.

I just kissed Lee Jeno.

I couldn't go to sleep anymore. I was too happy to. I wish I hadn't pulled away ugh.

An hour or so has passed and I was still awake. For half of the night I was fangirling about our somewhat make out session. A heavy object had landed onto my body. Thinking it was one of the cats, I pet the object only to find out it had no hair. It was Jeno's arm. I let his arm stay there as I soon fell asleep.

It was the next morning as I was the only one in bed. I sat up and looked around and heard the bathroom sink running.

"Oh good morning nana," Jeno said while brushing his teeth.

I grabbed my phone and snuggled back into the blankets as I checked my notifications until Jeno was done using the bathroom. Jeno was finally done and I quickly gotten up to use the bathroom.

Dear Diary,
October 11, 2018

I kissed Jeno and I'll never get over it.

I kissed him first then he held my face as if we actually were in love. Jsjdjs But then he stuck his tongue in which got me embarrassed and I turned away.

I wonder if he does love me? Or even remembers the kiss from last night.

I got out of the bathroom after washing myself up and looked at Jeno. He walked downstairs as I trailed behind him.

"My parents had to go to work today," Jeno started out. "Let's go get some breakfast."

I smiled to myself again. Is this a date? I love him. I nodded and we went out. Jeno walked besides me as I walked at the same pace he did. I wanted to ask him about last night and why he grabbed my face but was it too embarrassing to mention that to him right now? We entered the restaurant and got our seats as the waiter gave us our menus and left. I had chosen what I wanted and waited for Jeno to choose his. Our orders were taken and I looked at Jeno who was on his phone.

"Hey, Jeno." I said. "Do you remember what we did last night?"

"Oh." Jeno looked up at me. "Yeah...sorry I grabbed your face I had a dream I was kissing some girl. I didn't want to be rude but after you fell asleep I watched my mouth."

"Oh," I said. "Okay. I'm gonna go to the bathroom."

Jeno nodded and looked at his phone.

I locked down the whole entire bathroom and sat in front of the door.

"So that kiss meant nothing to him," I cried. "So he really is just some straight asshole, his mom lied to me."

I cried my eyes out. I can't believe I kissed him and I can't believe it meant nothing to him but a stuPID KISS FROM A GIRL IN HIS DREAMS!

I washed my face and went back to Jeno. I grabbed 20 dollars from my wallet, put it on the table and left him there. I didn't need no stupid ass man in my life who kissed me and it meant nothing. I cried to myself again. I was all happy from a kiss that Jeno didn't even like. I took the time to find my way home from that breakfast area. I'm lowkey disappointed that Jeno didn't come running after me like in those dramas. But those are fake, this is real life. 30 minutes passed and I was home. Yoonseo had opened the door and I completely ignored her existence and ran to my room locking the door.

Dear Diary,

I just want a hug from him or at least a small conversation. I mean I did talk to him in the restaurant but his words only shot me in the heart.

GOSH I HATE LEE JENO SO FUCKING MUCH

but I know I won't get over him.

I swear its not even a crush anymore. I've fallen in love with him.