Eyes of green Eyes of blue (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 18

<Harrys POV>

1 Week later

Today it's one year ago that Gemma died. I miss her so much. Me, my mom, my dad and louis goes to her grave, we all are crying our eyes out. After this we go to Nandos, everyone eats, even I do. Louis have been really supportive, gosh i really love him. Then Louis have to go because he is going to baby sit his sisters. When we arrive at home everyone is still sad. My dad said he will be sleeping over since he lives on the other side ofLondon. "I wanna be alone in my room for awhile" I say and then I rush upstairs. I slam my door shut and then i look for the key to my rooms door, I find it in my night stand and I lock my door.

I walk over to my body mirror and looks myself in it. All I se is a broken, fat, ugly person. And my eyes is emerald green, but also lifeless. Suddenly I can hear myself scream and I can't see, my vision gets blurry and the tears starts to fall. I walk into my toilet connected to my room and I kneel infront of the toilet. I take my fingers in my mouth and I make myself throw up. i just cry harder and harder. After I flush the toilet and I brush my theeth. I take my shirt off and looks at myself in the mirror. I look so discussing. I am so fat and ugly, I walk into my bathroom and looks for my razor.

I found my razor on the sink. I break it and I take one of the blades. I stare on it for awhile. I walk over to my mirror in my room with the razor blade in my hand. Suddenly I start to talk with myself.

"I am doing this for you, the reflection. I am starving to get you less fat but it doesn't work, you are still fat, I am cutting you because you need to feel pain, you don't deserve happiness, only pain, You don't deserve a home, family, friends or yoyr boyfriend. just go and die so i don't need to see ya anymore, wouldn't ya" I was now crying so much and so hard, I've never done it before. Then i take the razor and cuts 5 scars on my wrists. And 3 scars on my tummy. I walk over to my bathroom and strips off my jeans and boxers, I saw that my jeans were drowned in blood. I put on the shower and waits until it's warm enough. then I jump in and clean all my scars, my hair and the rest of my body, an hour later I am done, I am still crying and I take an towel and I dry my hair and body. i walk over to my warderobe and puts n a pair of black Kevin Clein boxers. 

I close my warderobe and i walk over to my bed. I crawl under the sheets and hugs my teddy bear Tommo. I cry so hard and I scream so loud. I scream and scream, and cry and cry for over an hour before I finally fell asleep. Just when I thought everything would be fine, everything falls again.

A/N

Oii Oii

Thanks for reading this chapter, keep on voting and more chapters will come soon.

All the love Jennifer<3