Loss

3

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Marinette's P.O.V

My mind went blank with only the doctor's message repeating in my head.

"...Sabine Dupain-Cheng has passed away."

"...has passed away"

"...passed away."

I felt my lip quiver and eyes burn, ready to release every emotion I felt at the moment. Pain. Anger. Guilt. Question after question began to drill their way into my skull. I felt myself trembling, eyes focus on the wall on the other side of the room but not paying attention to anything. My world crashed and burned to the floor in a blink of an eye.

Everything collapsed in an array of frustration that would haunt me every night and minute of the day. My legs wobbled from beneath until my knees gave out, and I fell to the floor in a heap.

Sadness overwhelmed my soul as I gasped for air and the first sob filled the room. My heart ached for mama's hugs and kisses one more time, to see her smile wishing me a good morning.

That won't ever happen again. She's gone! She's dead!

My body racked with sobs, growing louder after the other and tears burned my face as they slid down my cheeks. This can't be happening! This can't be real...right? This is just a dream-no, nightmare that I'll wake up from and mama will be okay. She will hold me and say that she is still here. She's alright.

Yet, the pain felt too real, so it couldn't be a dream. I cried for the loss of my mother. I need her. I can't bare the thought of not seeing her ever again. Why did this have to happen to such a sweet and kind person? Why did it have to be her?

"Marinette, you need to calm down before an akuma gets here," Tikki warned, concern laced in her voice. I shakily gasped and sometimes hiccupped trying to steady my mind, ridding the bad emotions from my mind.

"Deep breathes in and out. In. Out. In. Yeah, just like that," my Kwami encouraged, the sensation brushing of her small hand on my forehead trying to comfort me.

Once I was breathing normally again, I slid to the nearest wall and brought my knees to my chest, hiding my face from the world. Tikki did her best to comfort me.

I appreciated that a lot, but it was hard to focus on happy thoughts when all I want to do is cry. Questions raced through my mind so quickly that I almost didn't hear the chime of the bakery's bell.

Does papa know what happened yet? If he doesn't, how will I break the news to him? How am I going to tell my friends without breaking down in front of the whole school? How am I going to save Paris if I am an easy prey for Hawkmoth?

I need to be strong and the only way to do that, without anyone noticing, is to avoid people. No more being weak. No more crying. My job is to keep people safe, not be a victim for evil purposes.

Ladybug failed to save someone once, she nor Marinette will ever be helpless ever again. I don't think I would be able to break papa the news. Hopefully, it's still in the messages. I stumbled up to my room quietly when hearing my father's footsteps coming up the stairs. I shut the door when the creaking of the door opened.

"Marinette, are you still here?" Papa called. He sounded like himself...sort of. He probably didn't know about it yet. Carefully, without making too much noise, I crept to the stairs that lead to my bed and went up them to lay down, hugging a pillow closely.

I heard shuffling downstairs before the muffled sound of the phone's messages played. Not wanting to hear my father cry, I escaped through the skylight and onto my balcony. I sat on my chair and stared out at Paris's scenery, trying to get my mind off of reality.