Return to New York

No Response

Newt started when he heard Bunty call his name. He had drifted off, staring into space. He hated to admit it but he was worried. He had always believed that worrying meant suffering twice but this time he couldn't help it. It had been over two weeks since his book signing and he hadn't received a letter from Tina. His owl had returned with no response but that wasn't unusual. Sometimes Tina would send his owl back without a letter if she hadn't had time to write that day. Then Newt would receive a letter from her a day or two later, either carried by another owl or through the Muggle post. However, this time, days had gone by and he still hadn't received a letter. He was getting nervous. Hundreds of possibilities were flashing through his mind, almost none of them good. 

Newt got to his feet and went to see what Bunty needed. When he was done helping her, he went back upstairs and began writing a letter.

My Dear Tina,

It's been a while since you've written and I can't shake the feeling that I've done something wrong. I'm trying to go over what I wrote in my last letter but I honestly don't remember much of it. I was so upset because of my travel ban and the thought of not being able to see you again that I wasn't thinking clearly. If I said something wrong, please don't take it to heart. I'm sure I didn't mean it.

Unfortunately, my travel ban is still in place. Every day without you is incredibly painful and I miss you so much. Leta tells me that Theseus is trying to arrange a meeting for me to see if we can get the ban lifted. I hate this separation. I want to be able to see you again. I want to feel you in my arms again and I miss the feeling of your lips on mine. I love you so much, darling, and I miss you more than I've ever missed anyone or anything.

I've just remembered what I said in my last letter. I realize I said something rather insensitive about Aurors. I promise I didn't mean it, not about you. I realize I shouldn't have said it but I wasn't thinking when I wrote it. The truth is, I have found that many Aurors are careerist hypocrites, even my brother can be a bit like that at times, but you aren't. You're different than every other Auror I've met. You're different than every other person I've met. You're wonderful, Tina. Most Auror's I've met won't hesitate to destroy a life, just remember what they did to Credence last December, but you're different. You're the only one who wanted to save him, and not because he was powerful but because you valued his life. That's what makes you different. You value the lives of others, both humans and animals alike. You would never willingly kill the innocent, instead, you protect them from those who would hurt them. I know how important your job is to you, Tina, and I'm very sorry about what I said, but I promise, I didn't mean it about you. When I wrote it, I wasn't thinking about you as an Auror. You were simply my fiancée, the only person I really trusted.

I love you so much, Tina. Please write to me. It's hard enough for me not to see you. Don't make it worse for me by not writing back. I don't know why you aren't writing and the reasons my mind can come up with are so upsetting. I've never loved anyone before and I never knew how painful it could be. But I also never knew how wonderful it could be and, when we're together, I've never felt anything so wonderful. Leta's been trying to comfort me and tell me that the Ministry's ban can't last long and I'll be able to see you soon. Her support is nice, but it could never compare with simply being with you.

One more thing, I meant to tell you this in my last letter but it slipped my mind. Leta and Theseus are getting married. They've been dating for a while now, I don't know why I never mentioned it to you. I'm very happy for them and I'm sure they'll be happy together. They really do love each other. Their wedding has been scheduled for 6 June next year. They've asked me to be best man. Hopefully, you'll be able to attend as well, not as my date but as my wife.

I miss you, Tina, and I love you with all my heart.

Love,
Newt

Newt sent this letter and waited for a response. A week passed, but still, none came. Worry was beginning to be his constant emotion. It made working difficult and Bunty was constantly calling him out for drifting off. In fact, he had several new scars on his arms and chest because he had lost focus while dealing with some of his more dangerous creatures. His worry was also impacting his sleep. He always struggled to fall asleep, his mind whirling with thoughts of what might have happened to Tina. When he finally did fall asleep, his sleep was filled with nightmares; visual representations of his daytime fears.

Sometimes Newt would dream about the execution chamber in MACUSA and the time Tina had nearly died. Other times he would see Tina lying motionless in an empty field or with a fight happening around her. He would wake up in a cold sweat and go downstairs to make himself a cup of tea. Sometimes he would make himself a cup of coffee, though he always put cream and sugar in his. The smell reminded him of her, of their dates, of how she was always trying to work. The taste reminded him of their kisses; the gentle kisses and the passionate ones. 

The fact that Tina wasn't replying didn't make Newt write to her less. Instead, he began writing to her more often. Eventually, he was writing a letter to her every day. Each letter was filled with his love. He would tell her about his day, about his nightmares, and about everything he was afraid of. He spoke about his creatures and the issues they were giving him. He didn't know if Tina was reading the letters but he hoped she was. He really hoped she was.

A/N: Yeah, it's still sad. Sorry. I hope you enjoyed. Please vote and comment.

It's almost 10:30 PM and I've got a whole math worksheet to do. I'm gonna go to the math room to get help from my dad. I haven't finished my English either but I can do that in the morning.

Have a good day!

Bye!

Written January 21, 2019.