Troublemaker

Physical

We went for a run this morning and wow that was a workout.

"Amanda are you showered?" mom yells

"yeah i'm coming" i yell

Demi's taking me to get a physical done since i haven't had one done in a while. I haven't told her yet but i'm terrified. I hate needles and i know i'm going to have to get a shot.

"we can go now" i tell Demi

We go out to the car and Demi starts driving. I turn on the radio in hope that it'll calm me down. As we pull into the parking lot my anxiety hightens. Once we get inside Demi signs me in while i go in the bathroom. I try washing my face and taking deep breaths to calm down but its not working. I take the random pair of scissors on the counter and rinse them off. Sitting them on my wrist a tear slides down my face. I try so hard to stay strong but the anxiety is making it worse. I hear a doctor call my name and i slide the scissors across my wrist twice.

"Amanda come on" Demi says

i hurry and clean myself up then come out.

"you okay?" Demi asks

"yeah" i say

Demi leads me back to the room and i'm instructed to sit on the bed. Demi sits in the chair and i try to keep myself calm.

"Hi Amanda" the doctor says

"hi" i say shyly

As the doctor gets ready i start shaking.

"mommy come here" i say

"whats wrong baby?" Demi says as she walks over to me

"hold my hand" i say

Demi takes my hand and i squeeze it.

"Amanda whats wrong" Demi asks

"i'm scared" i whisper

"aww baby don't be scared" Demi says softly "i'm right here"

Dr. Ramirez does the typical physical stuff then says the one thing i've been dreading.

"Alright Amanda you have to get a shot"

A tear slides down my face and Demi pulls me into a hug.

"do you want to sit in my lap for this?" Demi asks

i nod my head yes and Demi picks me up then sits down on the bed with me in her lap. Dr. Ramirez gets the stuff together and Demi hugs me.

"Amanda i need you to take your hoodie off" She says

I gulp and take my hoodie off being careful to not let anyone see my cuts. Demi sings to me as Dr. Ramirez gives me the shot.

"Amanda its all over you did great" Demi tells me

"thanks" i say

I Carefully put my hoodie back on.

"Amanda let me see your wrist" Demi says softly but sternly

i show her my clean wrist and she doesn't seem satisfied.

"other one" she says

i sigh and show her my wrist. She looks heartbroken.

"we'll talk at home, lets go" she says

We head home and i go up to my room. I start crying and Demi comes in my room.

"why baby?" she asks as she pulls me into a hug

"i was having a panic attack and couldnt stop myself" i make out between sobs

"was it because of the doctors?" she asks

i nod my head yes.

"baby next time you're scared come to me" Demi says

"i'm sorry" i whisper

"its okay baby we relapse sometimes but come to me okay" Demi says

i nod my head and Demi rubs my back. I feel myself falling asleep.

When i wake up i put band aids over my cuts and go downstairs. Demi's watching Extreme Makeover home edition so i curl up and watch it with her.

"this is the episode you're in" i tell her

"how do you remember this?" she asks

"lovatic, duh" i say

"good point" she says

i laugh at demi building the snowman and we decide to watch a movie when its over.