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Gaga texts me and interrupts our..talk.
"Sorry, I promised her I would answer on her texts." I say and take out my phone.

You should come back home now, your dad is on his way home as well❤️

I reply on it and then put my phone back into my pocket.
"I have to go" I say and he pouts.
"That's too bad" He says and helps me up.
"Yeah, I know. But I'll see you tomorrow" I say and kiss him bye.
"Yes bye" He says and I walk away. Putting my earphones in and take out my phone. I go into spotify and press play on my playlist.

I kind of wanted to take out a cigarette but I thought my dad would feel the smell when I got home so I'm gonna skip that

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I kind of wanted to take out a cigarette but I thought my dad would feel the smell when I got home so I'm gonna skip that. I get home and is met by the smell of spaghetti.
"I'm home" I shout.
"In the kitchen" Gaga shouts back and I take off my shoes and jacket, and walk into the kitchen.
"Hi" Gaga says and kisses my cheek.
"Hi, where's dad?" I ask and sit down at the kitchen island.
"In the bathroom" She says and puts down the food at the kitchen table.
"Where were you?" Gaga asks and motions me to come sit down.
"At the park with a friend" I say and sits down. She gives me a look and laughs.
"What" I ask.
"You're just saying "friend", and something's telling me you don't want me to know who it is because it's more than a friend" She says and I start drinking water so I can't say anything.
"I guess I'm correct" She says raising an eyebrow.
"Maybe, can we wait to talk about this until dad's here?" I ask. She nods with a smile. Right after that my dad comes in.
"Hey honey" He says and kisses the top of my head.
"Hi dad" He goes to sit down. We all take a plate of the food before we start talking.
"So how was your day?" Dad asks gaga, while I sit and push around my food. I'm too nervous to eat. I don't know why I'm nervous, it's just a date.
"Yeah it was fine, just looked around on outfits for some interviews and award shows " She answers while glancing over at me. They keep talking about some award shows and interview regarding A Star is Born. They're done shooting it now, it's just the afterwork left.
"And Kayla, how was your day?" dad asks me and they both look at me.
"Uhm yeah it was alright, pretty boring." I say and keep pushing around my food.
"I believe there was something you wanted to tell us" Gaga says and raise her eyebrow. My dad does the same.
"Oh, yeah uhm there's this thing.." I start.
"I'm going on a uhm on a.. date" I say, not looking at them.
"Oh really? When? With who?" Dad asks.
"On Friday, with my best friend, Michael" I say and they both nod.
"Tell us more about him, is he good enough for you" Gaga asks.
"He's really nice and cares a lot, he always wants what's best for everyone" I say and they both nod.
"Hmm he's not pushing you to anything right?" My dad asks and I immediately shake my head. They both look at each other and then back at me.
"How long have you liked him?" Gaga asks.
"Since the day I met him, months ago" I answer and she nods.
"If the date goes well, we need to meet him. Okay?" Dad says and I nod.
"He needs our approval" He says and I roll my eyes.
"Don't embarrass me, and we're not even a couple yet. And I don't even know if I want it to be either." I say.
"Why not?" Gaga asks.
"I don't know if I want a boyfriend. I mean I like him, but I don't know if I want a relationship." I say.
"You don't have to if you don't want, so what feels right for you." Gaga says and I nod.
"I mean I'm not ready for you to get a boyfriend yet either" My dad says and we laugh.
"Now continue eating, you have nothing to be nervous about" Gaga says, realizing that's why I hadn't touched my food.
After dinner I fix some stuff  before it got too late. When I was all done and got ready to sleep, I decided to call Cole.

C:Heyo sis what's up
K:I neeeeed to tell you something
C:spill it
K:Michael asked me on a date
C:SKSKSK FINALLY OMG I'VE WAITED ON THIS FOR SO LONG MY GOD
K:Okay calm down
C:I'm calm what're you talking about
K:Yeah right, But the thing is I don't know if I want this
C:Uh say what now
K:I don't know if I like him, like do I?
C:Sis, you do, now what is this, are you scared?
K:I don't know, I'm just like it's too much, I just don't know
C:Okay I'll tell you this, go on this date, and then see how you feel
K:Yeah, that sounds like a good idea
C:I only got good ideas
K:It's just that my social anxiety is really getting into my head about all this
C:Don't listen to it, I know me telling you this isn't gonna help, but you're overthinking and I know it's not your fault but try not to listen to that so much
K:I'm trying, it's just too much in my brain right now I can't stop thinking
C:Do something that relaxes you, like drawing or writing or whatever
K:Yeah that sounds like a good idea
C:Good, I gotta go, see you tomorrow bye love you
K:Bye love you too

I hang up the phone and lay still on my bed for a moment. Trying to sort out my thoughts. Maybe it's better if I do what Cole told me. I get up and walk to my desk. I start letting all my thoughts on paper, drawing some weird things. It actually worked, a little at least. I looked at the clock. 1am. Maybe should get back in bed. I've always had a hard time with sleeping. So this wasn't something new. I laid there alone with my thoughts. 1.30am, 2am, 2.45am. When it was 3am I was thirsty and got up to get some water or something. I try to walk as quietly as I could. But when I get to the kitchen I see gaga sitting there.
"I didn't know you were awake." She says with a sad smile. I could tell she had been crying. I walk towards her and gave her a hug.
"I've always had trouble sleeping" I say with a sad smile.
"But why have you been crying?" I ask her. She puts her head in her hands.
"I'm just in a lot of pain and stress right now, but you don't have to worry about me" She says trying to give me a smile.
"Please tell me more on what's going on, I love you so I will worry" I tell her.
"Chronic pain" She says right before clenching my shirt in her hands.
"I've seen your documentary" I say with a sad smile. And take her hand in mine so she can squeeze it.
"And then there's a lot going in my head right now. How I'm going to balance you and Bradley, my career and my fans. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. " She says starting to cry again.
"Let's just take this one step at a time okay" I say giving her a reassuring smile.
"Your career is doing okay, so don't worry about that right now. You'll have the vegas residency, so your fans will be thrilled about that and A Star Is Born. Me and dad is right here, and will always be." I say and she gives me a smile, a real one this time.
"You're so smart for such a young age" She says and caresses my cheek. We sit there for a moment.
"Do you want to sleep with me tonight?" I ask her. She nods. We walk towards my bedroom. We get into my bed and she holds me in her arms. I always feel safe here, in her arms. I feel loved.

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