Existential Indifference (Joshler)

39. Needle

***Trigger warnings for domestic violence and emotional abuse, a homophobic slur, mentions of overdose, mentions of relapsing, mentions of drug use, and mentions of past abuse.***

Wait to start the song.

Tyler's resolve crumbled throughout the course of the day. All he could think about was how badly he wanted to drop by Josh's trailer and make sure he was okay. He couldn't focus during class, couldn't register anything that was going on around him really. Maybe that was why it scared him so badly when someone grabbed his arm and pulled him to the side of the hallway. He was fully prepared to defend himself against a homophobe or to listen to Brendon rattle off more "facts" about the Mattress Firm conspiracy he was so obsessed with, but there were lips on Tyler's.

Tyler gasped against the mouth pressed to his, grabbing onto the front of Jake's shirt out of instinct. He felt those familiar lips smile against his, and suddenly, he was nauseous. He was afraid. He wanted to be anywhere but here. He wanted to be with Josh.

Jake smiled at Tyler with a false look of affection, grabbing Tyler's face a bit too harshly in one hand and swiping his thumb lightly along Tyler's bottom lip. "Where are you running off to?" He asked amusedly, knowing full well that Tyler was too afraid of him to actually leave now.

"I-I'm-" Tyler stuttered weakly, being cut off by a kiss being pressed to his lips as he was forced to stumble backwards, his back pushing a door open.

Tears flooded Tyler's eyes when he realized he was being crowded into a bathroom. It wasn't the same one as last time, but it was silent enough for Tyler to know that there was no one there to help him if he needed it.

"Come on. I bet your crackhead boyfriend wasn't taking care of you like I do. Let me take care of you, baby," Jake cooed as he pressed Tyler back against a cold tile wall. His teeth attached themselves to Tyler's neck, biting down hard enough to break blood vessels.

Tyler cried out, and not for the reason Jake wanted him to. "No. I don't-I'm not-" He cut himself off with a sob. No part of him could explain how he got the courage to push Jake away from him or why the only words that left his lips were: "You ripped my overalls."

The other man's green eyes looked amused as they darted down to the overalls locked around Josh's hoodie. "Your overalls?" He asked with a smirk.

"You ripped them. You broke them. You did that. You gave me bruises and ripped my overalls, and I don't want you to touch me anymore," Tyler blurted out, no confidence present to back up his statement.

The smile dropped off of Jake's face, which suddenly looked like the cold mask he'd been wearing every single time he'd made Tyler bleed in the past. "You don't get to tell me what to do, you fucking faggot. You're lucky I'm even giving you the chance to touch me when you're the most pathetic piece of shit on the face of the earth."

Tyler sobbed, trying to escape Jake's grip, which only tightened on his arms. "Please. I don't want to do this. I can't do this again."

It shouldn't have shocked Tyler as much as it did when Jake punched him hard in the face, but he still touched the fountain of blood spurting from his nose in stunned silence. He squeezed his eyes shut when Jake spat in his face before shoving him to the ground.

"Good thing it's not your fucking choice then, isn't it?" He spat at Tyler, making him sob again.

Tyler looked at the bathroom door. It wasn't far. He could get to it if he was fast enough. That is, he could've before Jake yanked him back up by the front of his shirt and kissed him, not seeming to mind the taste of Tyler's blood against his tongue.