My First Romance

Chapter 031: Last

Chapter 30: LAST

       

      

STEPHANIE  

  

They say this is where 'most' relationship last for just months, sometimes weeks, or worse case scenario, day/s. Love seems to be a game na kung sawa ka na, go get another one. It's over, it's done. Flirt today and forget it tomorrow. 

I saw how they exchanged partners, ka-relasyon nya ngayon, bukas hindi na. Making love with no strings attached. Landian here, landian there, landian everywhere.

I don't get it for I don't play with love. I want a 'REALationship' not a 'relationSHIT'. 

Kahit ilang beses kong intindihin, hindi ko maintindihan at ayokong intindihin. 

Everyone wants to love and to be loved, everyone wants to be happy, everyone wants to have fun, everyone loves partying, there's no big deal on that. But curse are those who are involve in a third party affairs. Sorry not sorry. Bakit kasi kailangang ilagay mo ang sarili mo sa isang sitwasyon na kahit anong gawin at ibigay mo, ikaw ang talo? Sa sitwasyong ikaw and dehado.

However, biting on the brighter side, being a call center agent is a lot of fun, too. Superbly amazing. 

Nandyan ang abot-kamay at latest gadgets na pwede mong mabili anytime you want, out of town or out of the country's escapades, exclusive treats, gift certificates, sodexos, performance bonuses at pwede ba namang mawala ang pinaka-,mamahal kong Symphony, Baby Ruth, Maitre Chocolatier's Ferrero, Ritter Sport, Lindt, Valor and Guylian chocolatte? 

Nasasayo naman kasi 'yon on how you will go with the flow; if it'll make you better or if it'll make you worse. Your life. Your choice. So, be wise!

***

I sighed as I tap my phone's screen on. 

"No texts, no calls, anong silbi mo? Pang-surf, panglaro?" Fudge, Iam mentally talking to my ever-dearest Samsung Galaxy phone again. As usual, boredom strikes. Aargh!

They offered VTO dahil sobrang avail. Once in a blue moon lang mangyari 'to kaya kahit na bawas sa working hours at sa sweldo, kebs lang. 

"You're pretty!" I told myself as I look at the mirror. Fully retouched and looking fresh as always. "But you're unhappy." I added as I took my bag and made my way out. Nakakainis, bakit ba bigla akong nakaramdam ng lungkot? 

Siguro hindi na ako sanay mag-isa.  It's been a month since Bill left and moved in the US. Galit daw sya sa akin, kaya doon nalang sya hahanap ng 'someone', yung blonde, blue eyes at mas maganda at sexy sa akin. Baliw na yun! As if naman hindi ko alam ang dahilan ng pagpunta nya dun. 

I decided to spend the rest of my night in SB, my ultimate 'tambayan'.

What's on your mind? Ang laging tanong ng makulit na si mareng Facebook. Lintek, walang kamatayang WHAT's ON YOUR MIND na yan!! You should have asked me who's on - Ugh, NVM!

"Who's up tonight? My treat." Hashtag alone & free ;)" 

My friends liked and commented. Yeah, netizens! Waah, stop! What I want is someone to be with. Mga paasang 'to, sasama sasama, pupunta pupunta, wait lang, wait lang. Sagana sa salita, kulang sa gawa. My girlfriends! Ang hirap nilang hagilapin at idate, when they're in a relationship. But if they're single? Gaaad, mabilis pa sa alas-kwatro. Isang text mo lang, sugod agad. 

I think I'm gonna spend this night alone. Of all people here, ako lang ang solo flight. No date? Alonely. Keber, IDC! 

Mabuti nalang dito ako pumwesto sa bandang gilid, dim-lighted at halos walang tao. Okay fine, headset on, volume up, ignore the world. Go, Steph!

I froze and I felt like I'm one of the 'ice bucket challenger', nanlamig akong bigla, nagising ang naaalimpungatan kong diwa and I shivered from head to the tips of my toenails the moment I saw him coming. KENNETH LEWIS.

Hindi ko alam kung gaano kabilis pero nagulantang ako nang makarating at umupo na sya sa mismong tapat ko. I blinked my eyes twice, sheeeet! This isn't happening. 

"Hi." I doubtfully muttered, naknam! What the F is he doing here?

He held my hand and he kissed the back of it, with his gaze not leaving me, "I miss you." and with those words, I partially lost my mind. 

"What?" 

"I love you." he uttered and I just died. 

I shook my head, bitterly responding, trying to pull my hand off him. Ayoko ng gaguhan, ayoko ng lokohan. After all, I miss you? I love you? Fck! Asshole! Bullsht! Sira ulo yata to 'eh!

"Steph, let me to explain, five minutes, please?" he pleaded and his eyes registered pain. 

I secretly clenched my jaw, controlling myself from bursting out. 

I annoyingly rolled my eyes on him. Anim na buwan, bakit ngayon lang? Ngayon pa kung kailan handa na akong kalimutan siya. Ngayon pang tanggap ko nang hindi kami para sa isa't isa. Okay na eh, hayan na naman siya, umeepal. Pumapapel. Hindi pa ba siya masaya? Ano pang kailangan niya? 

"Whatever! Four minutes and fifty nine seconds left." I declared wishing for the fcking five minutes to be over. Wala naman akong balak makinig, magsalita ka, sige. I won't give a damn, I won't fcking care! Bahala ka sa buhay mo!!

-- -- -- 

"Steph, I want you back." mas humigpit ang pagkakahawak nya sa kamay ko. "Be mine again."

Hindi ko alam, hindi ako makapaniwala sa mga narinig ko, hindi ako makapaniwala sa mga nalaman ko. This is too much to take in! Akala ko sa mga telenobela lang nangyayari ang mga ganito, yung may kontrabida, sa tunay na buhay din pala. 

Nasasaktan ako dahil umiiyak at nagmamakaawa sya. Tarantadong puso ko 'to, sinaktan na't lahat, affected parin? 

"It's not that easy."

"Am I too late? May iba na ba?"

Walang iba, ikaw pa rin. 

I shook my head and in no time he was able to cup my face with his hands. Naramdaman ko ang pag-init ng pisngi ko, this is the exact feeling I had the first time he touched me. He faced me until we're eye to eye. I miss looking at him at this range. Very close. 

"You still love me, yeah?" he inquired.

"Hindi ko alam." I said, averting my gaze. I'm mentally assessing myself, my heart, my feelings. Do I still love him? 

"I love you." he said before giving me a short lip kiss. I was shocked and delighted at the same time. Call me crazy because I felt like punching his face after that kiss. Why the heck did he make it that quick? 

He stood and placed me in front of him. "I love you." he muttered as his left hand rolled around my waist. Tinangka kong lumayo pero hindi ko nagawa, he snuggled me closer until no distance was left between us. 

"I love you." and I felt how he softly brushed his lips on mine. I didn't respond, this shouldn't be happening. But I was betrayed by myself because in no time, I found my lips gracefully dancing with his. Eagerly responding.

I don't know if it's me or him who made it senseless, but the feeling was absolutely euphoric.

At that moment, I'm willing to start all over again. Naging malinaw na sa akin lahat, hindi naman pala nya ako niloko at initsa-pwera.  Naipit sya sa sitwasyon at pinili lang nyang gawin kung ano ang tama. 

If I were on his place? Yes, I'll definitely do the same. Hindi ko hahayaang may inosenteng madamay at masaktan. 

Kung alam ko lang, maiintindihan ko. Hindi ako magiging madamot. 

Sinubok kami ng tadhana, nasaktan namin ang isa't-isa. At ngayon, isang bagay nalang ang mahalaga, siya at ako, kaming dalawa. Hindi ko na hahayaang mawala ang una at kaisa-isang lalaking minahal, minamahal at mamahalin ko sa buong buhay ko. 

My First Romance. 

- The End -