𝕓𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕣 . - J.Mz & B.Hd

21. Say goodbye.

At the end, didn't matter how long they held hands, how much Ben told Joe about his day, how amazing their sex was, Ben was indeed straight. 

-

It was 1 AM when Ben left his apartment. Joe just came back from Gwil and Ben was just leaving and he could surely say it wasn't for him. 

" Hey. " Ben said stopping his tracks. " Where were you? " He asked and Joe tried his best to keep up a normal conversation up. " O-oh well, I was with Gwil. " He said cursing at himself for stuttering. " Oh. Well, okay. " Ben said already walking away. " Where uhm- Where are you going? " Joe asked. " Oh, just. Someone.. " He said before getting into the elevator. Joe knew he was acting weird but at this point it looked as if Joe was the normal one because what was that?

Joe laid on his bed looking at the ceiling with the thought of Ben ' going somewhere '  still lingering on his mind. " Where the fuck was he going? " He asked himself furrowing. Well it didn't matter anyways because Joe is still just a bestfriend that can't keep Ben home. Even though he was trying to keep himself distracted he couldn't help but only think about that.

Where would he go actually? Would it be... No of course not, right? Joe didn't know since Ben could do whatever he wants. He could have a threesome and at the end of the day it would be none of Joe's concern to judge him about that. But it hurts so much. The thought of Joe being truly alone after all of this made his heart drop. At this point he hated how inlove he was with his bestfriend who didn't even look at Joe the way Joe looks at him. He didn't like it, he wished he could just move on and find someone else so that it wouldn't hurt that much when he would hear from his friend that he's inlove with someone else other than Joe. 

Rami warned him for this and he warned himself for this. The first couple of days were heaven being inlove. After that thoughts ran through his head and he hit himself with realization. Tears soon fell down making his throat swell up, luckily he was alone in his room. He cried for the whole night hoping the pain would go away. Why did this have to hurt so much? 

" Maybe if you tried to hook up with other boys? " Rami suggested but Joe was too far gone to actually respond to that. He didn't want any other boy, he wanted Ben. He wished he could turn off his feelings and act like there was nothing wrong when clearly the past days it seemed as if everyone knew something was off except for Ben.

Not much later when Joe was still awake watching Spongebob he heard a knock. He turned off the tv and walked to towards his door hearing the knocking again. " Yeah, yeah I'm coming. " He said opening the door but getting shoved back. He had so many questions but the first thing was: " What the actual fuck? " because he was sure that Ben wasn't home and was going ' Somewhere. ' so why did he come here? Even though he got many questions he didn't complain getting kissed the living hell out of him. Joe stepped back as he got pushed only to hit his back against the wall and yet again, he didn't complain but he did however whimper. " Take it off. " Ben murmured against his neck already pulling Joe's shirt over his head. Joe only could obey and let himself fall even more inlove.

It had been a long time since the two did their thing so Joe was of course glad but something was different? Joe knew there was just something different this time. Maybe it was just him overthinking or maybe it was because of him feeling different now since he liked Ben.

Or maybe, just maybe. It was how even tho Ben kissed him passionately in the beginning he eased down kissing Joe as if he was glass that could break any moment. Or maybe it was how they made no sounds whatsoever only Joe's whimpers and quiet moans filling the room. It could also be the way Ben had eye contact with Joe for the first time ever when they fucked. It could also be the fact that it felt like time stopped. Or maybe the way Ben was actually careful even tho they fucked plenty. 

It could also be that Joe didn't know this would be the last time.

hello 🤠 well i cringed at that hahs and I know its REALLY short but i wanted to make this only ben and joe so .. 🙂