-Nia-
Hindi padin ako makapaniwala. Kanina lang ay kinukumbinse ko pa ang sarili ko sa kung ano bang mas dapat gawin tapos ngayon, heto ako, sa bisig ng taong mahal ko.
" Namiss kita ng sobra."
" Parang hindi naman! Hindi mo nga ako hinanap eh!"
Tumasa sya habang yakap ako at pareho kaming malayo ang tingin sa dagat.
" Kasi naguguluhan pa ako eh. Ayokong isipin mo na pinagsasamantalahan ko ang tiwala mo. Gusto ko din munang siguraduhin sa sarili ko na okay nako. Ayokong sabihin mo na panakip butas ka kasi hindi mo deserve yon. "
" So, naisip mo man lang ba ako?"
" Sa isip ko na nga ikaw nakatira eh. Araw-araw, oras-oras, sa bawat pag gising at pagtulog ko, ikaw ung nasa isip ko eh."
" Talaga ba? Eh kamusta naman kahapon? Nagkita na kayo ni Maine, anong feeling? Tyaka nabalitaan mo na ba? Wala-"
" Nagkita kame, nagkausap. Okay naman. Actually, kausap ko sya nung tumawag ka. So ayun. Okay kame. Friends."
" Sure ka? Walang hard feelings?"
He laugh.
" Wala nga! grabe ka! eto na nga oh, luluhod nako"
Nagulat ako ng lumuhod nga sya sa harapan ko. Hawak ang dalawang kamay ko at nakatingin sa mga mata ko ng buong pagmamahal.
" Nia, alam kong maaga ito. Ni hindi pa nga ako nanliligaw. Alam kong mas nauuna dapat yung panliligaw kesa sa pagtatanong pero, will you be my girlfriend now and let me jusy court you everyday?"
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-Rj-
I cant believe she agreed! So this is what 'happiness' feels like. Ang tagal na din kasi nung huli ko itong maramdaman.
After nya akong sinagot, we spend the night at the resort, catching up. Inabala pala nya ang sarili sa paghahanap ulit ng trabaho. Na-miss ko syang kausap ng ganito! Yung tawa nya at mga hirit na mapapailing ka nalang!
Nia, she is indeed the only thing I need. To be happy, to keep smiling, to keep myself sane. Kasi ramdam ko ba kapag nawala sya, it will never be the same again.
Love? I dont know. Ang alam ko lang ay, ayokong mawala sya sakin. Ayokong dumating yung araw na, pagsisihan ko kasi pinakawalan ko sya.
" Rj?"
" Hmmm?"
" Kahit pumayag ako na maging tayo, dont pressure yourself to love me back okay? There's a big difference between love and like. I love you and You like me. Natatakot ako kasi alam kong may mali pero I want you to know that whatever happens in the future, okay lang sakin."
" What do you mean?"
" Kapag na-realize mo na mahal mo pa pala sya at kaya na nyang tanggapin lahat lahat sayo, you are free to go. Okay?"
" Nia-"
" You dont have to love me back, you just have to be true to me. That's all Im asking you."
" Im being selfish."
" Im giving you the right to be selfish."
" Pero, I can love you right?"
" Rj.."
" Because I think I am so close to that."
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The next few weeks after we became official is a struggle, we became busy with our career, me attending my shoots and meetings while Nia started her new Job. Good thing is that, she is now working in a Banking business around Makati. Meaning I can see her without her telling me to just rest instead of driving all the way to Pampanga.
I've already met her family! Nia laugh after seeing her family's reaction. Literal na, na-shock silang lahat! But nonetheless, I was welcomed with fair warning to not hurt their daughter from her parents. Ganon pala yung feeling na tanggap ka nila bilang ikaw, hindi bilang artista na kailangan i-pamper. Now I know why Nia is wonderful. She was raise by wonderful parents and surrounded by wonderful siblings.
Though Im starting to worry. Since I came back from the Hiatus and accepted the two year exclusive contract that APT offered, rumors and paparazzi shots are all over the biz-lines came back too.
Headlines saying, I am dating a non-showbiz girl, na hinintay ko pa daw mag break muna si Maine at yung boyfriend nya before I started dating, na kesyo ginagamit ko lang daw ang dinedate ko to move on, and so and so fort. There was one time when they got a clear picture shot of Nia, luckily, we were able to turn it down before kumalat.
As for me, it's more than okay to let everyone know who's Nia to me. Sya lang ang ayaw. And I understand. She is a private person after all. Ayaw ko din naman na magulo ang buhay nya dahil sakin. So we decided to keep mum about out relationship for the mean time. Alam kong ginagawa nya ang lahat to adjust for me. And I am so blessed because of that.
Today, I pick her up from work. I am surprising her today with the impromtu 'meet the Faulkersons'.
She is wearing her usual to-go clothes. A navy color knee-lenght empire cut plated dress and flats. They are not required to wear uniforms because she is working in a Banking Business Int. company that is base in the Philippines.
" Wala ka bang shoot? "
" Wala, tinapos ko na yung huli kanina so, Im free 'till saturday. Sunday naman SPS lang then free na ulit sa hapon."
" Wowwww, daming restttt.."
" Im slowing down for you. Ayokong mawala ka dahil wala akong time sayo."
I saw her stilled and look outside the window.
" Im not going anywhere Rj, hindi ako katulad ng iba. Alam ko kung saan ka masaya, kapag masaya ka, masaya din ako."
" Sus, sinabi nya din yan."
" And Im not her."
Okay, Im officially doom.
" Mahal, I know you're not. Sorry it came out wrong."
" Let's not talk about it, Rj. Just.. just do your kraft in your phase. Dont mind me because I understand you more than the credits you gave me."
It was a defeanibg silence after that. Hanggang makarating kami sa Concha's main branch where my family was, ang tahimik nya at hindi kumikibo. Hindi ko tuloy alam kung magandang timing pa ito to meet my family.
My staffs know her and are all instructed to keep mum about it.
I lead her to the function room where my family are but before I open the door, I decided to just tell her who is she meeting today.
" Ahm, Mahal, bago tayo pumasok,may sasabihin ako."
Tinignan nya lang ako at hindi umimik.
" Nasa.. nasa loob kasi ang family ko. I want you to meet them today, surprise sana kaso alam kong inis ka so sinasabi ko na ngayon para kahit papano hindi kana masyado mabigla."
And there I saw how her eyes widen in shock. Gusto kong matawa pero baka lalong magalit.
" Ano--"
Biglang bumukas ang pinto at bumungad samin si Rizza na ngiting ngiti.
" Hi! Ate Nia di ba? Im Rizza! It was nice to finally meet you!"
And before I even stop my sister, hinila na nya papasok si Nia.
