Neon Lights- Frerard

Chapter Six- Gerard

Here we stand on the lies that society tells us. They say that life is easy and full of joy. They tell us that we are at fault for not being the smiling child. They fault us for making mistakes. They judge us on looks, and not thoughts. They rid emotions that are real and by heart. They told us lies about others and forced us to discriminate or be discriminated. However, when one gets hurt, they back away and point fingers at others. They do not care about your freedom. And do not care how much you hurt inside, because, at the end of the day, all that matters is you look the best. Or act as if you are best. That is all they care about. They are vicious beasts who feed off of your doubts. 

"Gee? What are you writing?" Mikey asks tilting his head to the side. "You literally blanked out of reality and into your head." 

"Just a memo- of some sort." I look down at my writing. It's odd handwriting because the ideas were flowing faster than my hand could write. I look up at Mikey and Ray. 

"Well," Ray pats Mikey's knee and stands up. "I should blast. My parents need me back for some reason," he walks to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow... if I survive."

"Your parents aren't demons, I've met them!" Mikey calls back as the door closes. He turns to me and smiles. "So... Frank, huh?" 

"He's- quite interesting." And cute, and nice, and-

"Right? It looks like he's hiding centuries of memories in his head! Every time I look at him I can practically see World War l happen." Mikey stands behind me and rests his chin on my shoulder. "Damn, that's some deep shit over here," he skims the page. I quickly shut the notebook and stand up. He falls forward. "Rude," he mumbles. 

"I a science paper to fill out because Brent is an idiot and doesn't know shit," I grumble and walk upstairs. 

"Alright, honey! I'll just be preparing a chicken dinner!" Mikey says in falsetto. 

"Fuck off!" I shout back. 

~~

I finish the paper before grabbing my phone. New text message? I pull up the messages. 

Frank: Hi. 

"Holy fuck," I mutter under my breath. I nearly drop the phone as I sit on my bed. "Okay, Gerard. Don't say anything stupid. Be casual. Act like a normal teenager going through anxiety, stress, and no social life. Act normal. You're fine. Casual text..." 

Gerard: Hi. 

I sigh and lay on my back. "That wasn't so hard..." I stare at the phone. Staring, and staring. Okay, now you're just creepy. I click the screen black and sit back up. I walk myself over to the window and gaze out. My bedroom has a nice view of the back pond. It's quite beautiful. Especially during the spring. The trees come back and birds, squirrels, and rabbits come out. The pond is cleaned right after winter is over, so it's a nice clear blue color. I used to spend hours just gazing out, sometimes I'd write or draw by the window. It's my safe space. 

I look back at my phone, laying on the bed, hoping it buzzes. But no, nothing. Face it, he already hates you. 

No, he doesn't. If he did, why would he text you and hang out? 

I have this internal argument until I decide that he probably half hates me, and is busy. 

~Flashback~

"Now, Gerard. Why do you feel sad?"

"Everyone at school ignores me, and I feel like I'm this... black dot in the center of a neon square. I don't fit in, no matter how hard I try." 

"Maybe that's just because you haven't made any new friends. I think you should go talk to people."

"But that's hard for me," I whine. 

Lindsey sighs. "I know another kid, that I think you'll love. His name is Raymond Toro. He goes to your school and is in your neighborhood." 

"I don't know, but- I'll try," I say, just to get out of therapy. As long as she thinks she making a difference, we're good. She smiles and pats my shoulder. 

~End~

I roll my eyes at the memory. Even though 10-year-old me despised therapy... It gave me a good friend at least. Great, now you're getting sappy again.

Hi, sorry I haven't been updating recently, but yeeeaaahhhh...

~Lunar