Four Years [Poetry]

21. Any Idea

February 21, 2014

It kills me how

You just don't have any idea

Of how much you hurt me

First,

You admitted that you liked my best friend

After I told you I liked you

And not only that

You sent those words on my prom night

When all I wanted to do was to have fun

And forget about you

And forget that you didn't answer me

And forget that you couldn't even face me

And forget that you thought I didn't even deserve a reply

But I wish you never had done that

Anything was better than that

Then,

You said you were weak

And would never act the same way

Adding that "above all',

You admired me

And my courage

But, really?

You thought that

Would make me feel better?

I didn't want your admiration

I wanted your love

That was all

Later on, embarrassed, I wrote you again

Pretending everything was bien

"Go ahead and date my best friend for all I care"

That was what I said

But I'm the only one who knows

The pain

The hurt

The jealousy

The nights when I just wanted to cry

So no, you just don't have any idea