The free will ( eng)

Christmas

Three weeks before Christmas I am back in my shop again. I m devastated when I see the Chaos. It's furniture from the back room, boxes, clothes and stuff everywhere with a thick layer of dust everywhere. They cut the stone tile indoors?

After working 15 hours a day for a week unpacking, dusting and restoring everything I open the shop again. All I need to do know now is tell the world it's closing so I can sell as much as possible. I don't want to bring it all home. I'm done with moving stuff back and forth. I'm sick of it.

Christmas is coming up and so is the salsa party of the year, Salsaakadmins Christmas party. I m always more dead than alive on those. As usual I hardly sleep the night before, Olof comes to the shop at closing time. He brought some friends with him that occupies me for a few hours I could have tried taken a two hour nap on with half a sleeping pill to enjoy the party of the year and 6 hours of me being in dance heaven.

- I woke up four this morning and have nothing on my sleep account. I have to get some sleep or I can't go to the party, I say after he finished his wine and I hope he understands he must leave.

- okay Anna, Call me when you wake up and I will meat you there later. We say goodbye and I pour myself another glass of wine have some food and half a sleeping pill. It doesn't take. After a few hours of wishful thinking and anguish I'm gonna miss It all again , I give up and call Olof.

- Hi it's me.
- Hi Anna, did you get any sleep?
- No, I was too tired. But I will make a try to dance anyway. I am just gonna try and beautify myself for fifteen minutes and then I will leave.

Like a zombie I put on the sexy black dress Miguel forbid me to wear and wash up the vital parts and add some fresh make up and brush my hair. I walk fast the short distance to the club, leave my jacket in the wardrobe and change my shoes. My head flashes back to when I met Miguel there on our first "date" standing in line to leave our coats and one guy after another that I had be3n with or wanted to be with me came and kissed me on my cheek. I had to introduce him to my last boyfriend and a few admirers just withiin five minutes. I felt Like I was in some drama movie.

I order a drink in the bar and discrete take a seat in the couch tp see who is there? The professioinals Airways come late. After a while Olof arives. We dance a little but my energy is really low and with alcohol and sleeping I snap. I can hardly dance and laugh at everything. I cross my legs not to Lee my pants. Olof just thinks I'm funny and have a blast on all my yokes. I'm quite a comedian when I'm like this. It's dark Monthe Python humour... always look on the bright side when you are dying..

Before I totally loose it the music ends and it's time for the live shows, We take our seats The show is spectacular as usual. I sober up and realise it's time for me to leave.

- Good night Olof. I'M really exhausted. No more dancing for me. I hope you have a nice evening.

- Good night Anna! Im sorry You cant stay. Calj me tomorrow. HE hugs me and I get my clothes from the wardrobe. Disappointed to miss the party I walk home. It was with a small margin I got to see a bit of the biggest of this year, Hot Salsa Weekend when Olof and I went on Sunday. I was floating on air when I danced wuth a man who danced like a God and praises my skills to follow his lead. I thought it was a little strange? Excellent dancers seldom praise their partners, but then I saw he was the international star of the evening, who also held classes. Instructors were "allowed" to comment on dancing even if it was a social event, otherwise it was not custom and almost rude. I had

Olof and I had had a blast and went "all in" on the dance floor . We surely made everyone see us there. I also got the opportunity to dance "real" Kizomba with Caesar who laughed loud when he asked me how my tango affected my dancing at the exact same moment I made tango styling on our kizomba without hesitating.